Ashraff's Blurbs

tuesday at officework.

2011-07-19T15:08:00.003+08:00

i am superbored.
thats all i want to say.
this is my second last tuesday at the office, here in kelana jaya. and i think, days come and go, and the ten of us, the interns, no jobs to be done. bored. ;/

oh, and psttt! i am finally getting my torch, tonight. yayh! ;))

Conceiving Convo.

2011-05-16T00:44:00.005+08:00

convo suppose to be fun. a pay for everything that one has worked so hard for. but right now, i dont really felt that way. snorted! explains the 'conceive' word. i have water running down from my nostrils. and i dont feel so good right now. sore throats, and whatsnot. and tomorrow's the day. to take the robes. claims it. and wear it later on Wednesday. yeapsie. my Convocation/ Graduation Day people. the time that i suppose i have been waiting for quite some times now. but now that it's here. sigh. i guess i am not that excited and giddy anymore. i should be. i have worked well, quite hard. countless sleepless nights. assignments. dramas. such. but comes today, i dont know. the feeling? not so much. maybe i'd felt good once i actually in that stage, wearing the robes and square hats and smiling that fake smiles toward the cameras. either way, i juts hope that this would be over with in a hurry. so that i could move on, fond myself some jobs to do this four months holiday. save up for that Thailand trip. and enter new semester. ;D

Wish me Lucks/ Congrats, friends!

Changes.

2011-05-11T14:21:00.002+08:00

'Well I've been afraid of changes, cause I've build my life, around you', landslide, Glee.

this is it. four months of breaks. still cant believe its already started. i mean, yeah, i wasn't all that eager at first, to study, and honestly i could've done better in the papers, but yeah. it ended so abruptly. there were we, just getting warmed up, knowing each others, finishing the seemingly never endings series of assignments. then voila! final. a gapless final test, i must add. (3 days in a row test? an experience, thought exciting, i wouldn't want to undergo it again.)

four months in a new place, it taught me a lot. i met all kind of people. and my blockmates, they're cool. yeah. well, called me like kolot, or old-fashioned, or even, not growing up cause i still needs to live in a dorm, but it is one hell of an experience. one that many wont get. and the goodbyes yesterday, was hard.

there we were, four months and several days. and the possibility to be in the same room next time? equal to none. some chose to rent, others, well, everyone has their own plans. but it was really, really good while it lasted. so, here's more about my housemates.

*Rocky - He's the Sabahan. 24, or 25th, i think. he downloads all this high quality movie, and series. he's the supplier for glee. and, yeah, though annoying at times, he sure cheered up the room. ;)

*Tom - Another Sabahan. And slightly older, too. most of the times he keeps to himself. but, a great listener. once a while, when im really moody or such, he'd listen, and said, 'takpa'. oh, and such a pious and devoted Christian, or Catholics. *blame my short term. ;)

*Reezal - He's the first i encountered, back in 2nd of January, i think. a business people. and yeah, he's cool. and who knows behind all that messy looks, he got the brains.

*Imran - Surprisingly, my former schoolmates, one that i did not recognize at all. *short term, again. sigh. well, he, sure is the brain. he always seems to be studying. if i remember correctly, its not like him, back then. but people change. i think he found his muse, during his poli years. well, a boast, most of the times. and always seems to involve with a series of accidents. i sure hope he'll take great care later.

*Qarami - From the same place I am. Melaka. Fast track. well, i may have say some bad things about him, well maybe more, but thats what his unique i think. the confidence level, and whats not. and and he's crazy about Bieber. while i don't have any troubles with bieber cant say the same for others. haa.

and then there's the guys next door. the one who supplies the vampire diaries series, the one that share the laughs with. the one that i always ask for foods. it is cruel, that uitm offers the college, let us build all the relationships, and not guarantee anything, in future.

but, in a way, too, i think it is a good practice. hey, you cant predict the future. and while we're at it, we really did enjoys it. so, whatever happens later, i think we at least have brief memories. bittersweet one. now, where have i read this somewhere? oh, right. in this very blog. some seven months ago, when i was, devastated to leave lendu. but i managed, dont i?

and now that the books no longer in my list of interests, i think i am going to make the very best of these holidays. i'll try to finally get a blackberry. come up with that shorthand skills suggested by lecturers, class or no class, one way or another. and well, just having a good time.

and it'll start next week. at my convocation. yes, people. i have finally graduates. from diploma, yeah, but graduate nevertheless. ;)

i just hope that the days will be kind. and sunshine will always be there to light the ways up. hell, i sounded like those of the counselors, or someone writing a song. i could get used to this. ;D

Loads, II.

2011-04-05T16:16:00.003+08:00

What to say. Comes last two final weeks, everyone will updates, tweet, talk, or worst case scenario, even dreams about the same things: ASSIGNMENTS. well, what to do? that is a student life. last minutes workd should probably be the best work, the motto that was widely used back then. now, however, the same phrases just cannot seem to be applied, again. sigh.

But yesterday, i felt really really down. maybe its the fatigueness, of not getting enough sleep. maybe its the fact that i have been busting my ass off while other people just seems to be focusing on their own works and DO NOT takes any things seriously. maybe its the fact that i missed my mom. maybe its the fact that i am all alone, as previously stated. but i hate to think that maybe all the answers are wrong. maybe i am not born to be a good journalist, anyway. NO. I REFUSE TO ADMIT THAT! if so, why does i felt so natural when interviewing people. why am i eager to ask people around. and why am i jumping up and downs when i get to see Najib, our PM last Thursday?

But yesterday. The presentation sucks big times. I even tried to lie the lecturers. He must be hating me that much. No wonder there. And by the time of the last class, I found myself crying. sobbing. putting my heads down. so that people will not see me. SIGH! i am pathetic. but prior to that, this classmate of mine. of whom people will look up and say, 'Oh, the Pious One'. well, she practically raised her voices. No need to do that. I assure. But yeah. Journalist cannot be to softhearted. But I just cannot control myself.

Hmmph. I just wished for the weeks to end and passed fastly. Bye Now. Gotta pray.

Loads.

2011-03-31T06:40:00.004+08:00

Loads of works. Loads of task. So many, So little time. Comes undergraduates level, eveything seems so tough. He wants this, She wants that. And it IS hard to satisfy many people, with different needs, at the same time. God.

For instance, I have this quiz, that I will endure with, in less than two hours. of which I havent brought myself to study yet. And a replacement class. And a weekend trip to see elephants, deers, aboriginals people and whats not. Come back, later the video production for Language awaits. Not to mention Management's proposal to be presented. And Research's Questionnaires to be fixed.

Whoa. All this. And not enough rest. I wonder how will I survive this thing? My only prayer is to God.

Tapi usaha kena ada lah Der!

Oh well, I can only hope for the best. This will all be over, in no times pun, Insya Allah.

And well, notes to self. Please Please Acap jangan lupa baca buku untuk Finals. Oh, and Guten Morgen people.

Envy.

2011-03-27T21:54:00.002+08:00

sentap tengok semua orang dok tag gambar camping. course aku? TIADA!

haihh. be contented. thats what i always say, and advise myself. tapi menengokkan semua tu. . . Argh! Ada futsal. Ada Fantasy. hmmmph. sedih.

Tengokla! aku pegi sendiri aje trip mana mana. finish! end.

;)

aliens.

2011-03-26T23:21:00.009+08:00

come some points, this is what feels of ourselves. we either shut ourselves up, indulge in something, and have no cares about people around. this is what the writers feel much, these days. or, mungkin ini disebabkan pengaruh siri Roswell, lakonan Shiri Appleby, Jason Behr yang memang penulis minati suatu ketika dahulu. Woohoo!

either way, apa penulis mahu sampaikan bukan cerita yang saban hari dia tonton. tapi rasa yang kadang kadang penulis alami. semacam outsider. rasa tak keruan. not belong. jalan selesai? tutup telinga. tutup mata. buat hal sendiri. settle cerita.

di tempat baru, walau tiga bulan sudah berlalu, penulis masih rasa kekok dengan persekitaran. skill bawa motor, bolehlah sudah improve. lebih selalu dari tidak, penulis selalu rasa terasing dari dunia luar. mungkin kerana pilihan yang penulis buat, untuk tinggal di dalam, di Kolej Meranti, Seksyen 2 membuatkan dia agak terasing dan 'tak bersosial', bak kata seseorang.

In his mind, penulis pula berkata, 'biarlah dilabel anti sosial. bukan mereka yang hulur wang kat aku'. dan wang, di abad ke21 ini, memang sangat, amat crucial. every penny counts. niat penulis, jejak kaki, lanjut diri ke shah alam hanya satu. habis belajar, dalam kos yang paling minimum. tidak mahu susahkan ibu. ;D

and what is more crucial, penulis tidak mahu melayan apa apa perasaan kasih. suka, cinta. sayang. it will, no matter how good it is, be a distraction. dan penulis enggan perkara itu terjadi. walaupun, pada satu ketika, berada dalam lif sama dengan cinta hati penulis, membuatkan hati penulis rasa tak tentu arah, rasa hati penulis dapat dikawal. alhamdulillah. sekali lagi, return to the points of being aliens. yang mana makhluk ini, lebih kepada berseorangan. dan, jika Roswell jadi ukuran, cinta mereka banyak dugaannya.

on the other different matter altogether, aliens ada kelebihannya. satu, mereka punya kuasa. supernatural bukan suatu lagi debatnya kerana almaklum, ia tidak wujud. dalam pemikiran penulis, kuasa yang dia ada adalah satu. strongwill. dan kuasa super inilah yang menjadikan dia terus berjuang, isnin hingga khamis ke kelas walau adakalanya, hari sebelumnya semuanya lintang pukang. kedua, aliens boleh menyendiri. yang penulis sangat mahir lakukan. ada masalah. diam. silent is the best treatment, bak kata seseorang. mungkin aliens juga silent. tak pernah pula kita dengar mereka complaint apa apa, kan?

aliens atau tidak, penulis bersyukur. bukan semua ada ex5. bukan semua boleh duduk kolej. bukan semua dapat belajar uitm. bukan semua rasa apa yang penulis rasa. cuma satu. kan?

Oh. dan berbalik kepada edisi sebelumnya, yang penulis terus menjadi ketua projek, sepatutnya. satu perkataan: cancel. masing masing tuding jari. pihak atas tak buat kerja. itu ini. penulis tak mahu komen. penat sudah.

Aliens, Ashraf Hafizuddin. ;)

Stression.

2011-03-11T21:27:00.006+08:00

Gabung kan dua perkataan ini: Stress dan Tension? Apa anda akan dapat? STRESSION. Dan sekarang ini, inilah perasaan yang sedang si penulis, rasakan. Yes, stress adalah lumrah bagi pelajar. Biasalah, Tension assignments. yang kebanyakkannya, akan dihabiskan pada minit terakhir [hey, as they always say: last minutes' works is the BEST work]. Tapi, bagaimana pula dengan stress yang disebabkan oleh orang lain?

Penulis, yang dulunya pernah mengambil bahagian dalam persatuan, berfikir bahawa apabila tawaran untuk Ijazah tiba, 'okay, aku akan berusaha bersungguh sungguh dan takkan terlibat dengan benda benda lain.' Tapi, lain pula halnya. Dalam keadaan terpaksa, penulis dapati dirinya dalam persatuan/ kelab. Kelab untuk Kursus. Yang dia sendiri tidak pun meletakkan nama. Bukan itu saja, lambakan kerja dilakukan. Meeting dianjur pada setiap waktu, tidak semena mena. Padahal, dalam setiap meeting, higher authority-nya, NYDP dan YDP galak beramah mesra. Bergurau senda. Manakala, dengan jawatan sekadar WAKIL JAWATANKUASA SEMESTER 3, segalanya diuruskan.

'There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest', Elie Wiesel, American writer.

Bukan nama yang penulis mahu dan damba. Cukup sekadar ketenangan. Untuk menyudahkan assignment. Untuk fokus kepada goal untuk mendapat Dekan. Untuk menyudahkan Ijazah dengan Gred Kelas Pertama. Bukan juga niat penulis untuk tidak bersosial, tidak membuat kenalan, tidak mencari referens untuk masa kelak. BUKAN. Penulis cuma sudah lali, sudah lelah sewaktu di Diploma. Sekadar mahukan hidup yang tenang, dan bukan kesibukan selalu yang dicari. Walaupun, jauh di dalam hati, penulis masih mahu merancang, mengacara serta mengkordinasi majlis.

Cuma, penulis mahu, dalam perancangan majlis majlis seperti ini, kerjasama SEMUA pihak harus ada. Bukan sekadar tiga, empat kerat lelah buat kerja, lain nya menghela nafas, sekadar menanti khabar gembira.

Rintihan Sayu, Ashraff Hafizuddin.

zwei.

2011-02-24T21:02:00.003+08:00

okay, thats two, in german, or deustch. *and it is pronounced 'doish'. go figure! haha.

that is among what i had picked these two months. well, shah alam has been, hectic, as what i had imagined it to be. but during these two months, much has i picked. i learned german. i met my new classmates. i learned what Journalism is all about. and then, theres cute little friends, along the way. shah alam is hectic, no doubt. i missed melaka. lendu. lekir. but, this is my choice. degree. shah alam. meranti. oh, and then some. i am now, an offical class rep, of MC 221 3C. with that, yeah, come responsibility. bigg responsibility. and with that, too, comes drama, no doubt. i have had my fair shares. that makes me think, as the saying goes.

"no matter where you go, the situation will always be the same. the drama will always be there. different is, the people, the actors. and that you just has to play along."

and play along is what exactly i am going to do. after all, six weeks have passed. another eight weeks to go. then its a four months holiday, cant wait! <3

*what UiTM Shah Alam looks like*

*and this, is S & T tower. for engineering faculty.

;)

'Aidiladha Festivities.

2010-11-16T20:56:00.003+08:00

Its the time of the year, again.

Aidiladha, this year, falls on 17 November, 2010. Wednesday.

During this time, Muslims would gives, and contribute together. This contribution may be seen through the process of 'melapah'. I am a bit ashamed, since I myself as never done it. But, I still like to observe, every now and then. And for me, it does not matter how tasty the food is, how much Qurban you are willing to sacrifice, and how many friends' house you are visiting. The most important thing is to be with your family. and I am happily reporting, that I am happy, here in Keramat. With my loving family. My great 52 years old mom. My older 23 years brother, and my youn ger 19 years old brother. Now there may seems gaps between us. And we do not really talk a lot. But, I am glad they are here. As should everyone in the world. Just be happy that you are blessed with your families. Appreciate them. Never take them for granted. With this, here goes my wish!

'Salam Aidil Adha 1431 Hijrah.'

May Happiness and Joys Will Always Be With Us!

Cheers for a Delightful Day Ahead!

goodbyes.

2010-11-13T14:28:00.002+08:00

Bye.

simply saying it would be sad enough. and to actually deal with it? yeah. it is hard.

however, if there is no goodbyes, then there will be no hellos.

and truth is, we cant always live in that safe secluded spaces. there comes a time, you just have to let something go.

well, here's a goodbye to Lendu, Alor Gajah. this place has obviously made me, and shape me into who i am, now.

three years, and LOTS has been picked up.

lecturers, classmates. levelmates. blockmates.

;]

Updates, updates.

2010-10-21T01:45:00.003+08:00

hell, its been months.

well, lots has been goin on.

first, i am goin to grad these november, presumably by 13th, officially.

second, the pre graduation dinner and pre graduation lunch.

third, the EXPO - Fiesta Komunikasi 2010 - the one i am in Mass Comm line, for.

all in all, it has been an exhausted times of my lives.

but i am glad i have my lovelies, families and all those supports from everyones.

lotsa loves.

;)

2010-03-02T16:30:00.000+08:00

Islam - History of Islamic Education, Aims and Objectives of Islamic Education

misfortunes all over

2009-12-30T21:45:00.004+08:00

;[
it all happens so fast. one minutes, i was happily checking all trhe animals, the next thing i knew, the car got wreck. just like that.

and apparently, its not the only thing i have to face, throughout the semester's break. first, the kantoi. next, the scholar rejection. not forgetting, granny's not well. mom's car get wrecked. and now, this? seriously, i thought i had gained my strength. i am looking for better days. am looking for a little, celebration, in fact. but, the accident? well, it changes everything. i am now wearing clothes that already felt itchy since i cant go back home, since mom doesnt allow me to. and becoming real uncomfy at others' houses. and have to get ready and packing my stuffs for next sem begiinoing, hell, in monday.

i know, people may thing i bragged. but seriously, im not. i wonder, how does a stright a's (well, not straight, but doing good and keeping up) student, get stuck with all these? is this the price that i have to pay for the success? or is this is some kind of payback for my sin? as Muslim, yes, i believe in Qada' and Qadar. but at times, things just seems so much, SO much so that dead, seems like the best solution. maybe it is. hell. i dont know.

in less than two days, we'll be in 2010. it was suppose to be a new year, a new resolution, a new beginning. frest start. but, im still caught in yesterdays' issues. am still caught in same emotions. my wish? well, as for things to turn out if not better, well, slightly okayed, than all this.

'tis the season to be jolly

2009-12-24T03:56:00.007+08:00

.books that REALLY served well.

.Santa, and Snowman.

.This Little reindeer, is my personal touch.

well, its two days before Christmas. not that I celebrated it, but all the excitement, the reds, the whites, the Santa, the snow (obviously, this is the best part about christmas. sadly, there's none here. sigh), the warmth feel, and the fact that its Christmas itself. this all equal to one thing, JOY.

I believed, I had gone through my dark moments, if not just a while ago. but, thanks to Mitch Albom's Five People You Meet In Heaven, I cheered up, if not much. I know now, that everyone's connected, and not one person should feel that they're meaningless. And that everyone's path crossed, and that sometimes, in order for one to live a life, others has given theirs, instead. In a way, that little book has brought me back my confidence.

And the fact that I am now Fully-Licensed. Hah! That's also help.

And that it is CHRISTMAS! forgive and forget, one might say. As for me, I am happy, just to have the holiday. though, the sight of Santa wouldn't hurt.

misery, all over.

2009-12-20T00:09:00.004+08:00

Salve! (Hello, in Italy).

Lots has happened since the last update. More or less, im still the same ashraf, yes. but the memories that has taken place, throughout the entire week, will live forever.
first, the trip to bangsar, yet again for me. which i rewarded myself bit of 'tattoo' and little grocery.

then, on wednesday, I received two bad news. first, about my granny. apparently, she has some accidents, a serious one, that my mom decided to come back to our hometown. second, the application for the scholar, has been rejected, just like that. my feeling, toward both incidents, are rather undefined.

next, the night of thursday,and friday, came the withdrawn plans. for both of the night. honestly, I wasnt really excited about both nights. but, cant help but feel bit sad about it. as for friday, well, it was good, that I can be high all over in Andalus. but in singlet, that's not really a sight to be seen, and to be shown.

saturday came, and it was quite a disaster. yea, the pillow fight was entertaining, and the Flowers are, too. but, at the end of it, lots of drama suddenly burst through. first with the pump station, next with the shitty cats. and frankly, after all those fun, and drama, I believe it IS time for me to take a time off. and realized that, I still have a granny to be prayed for, and my world to crawl back into. after all, at least, it won't hurt so much in that small, dreamy world of mine.

“We are inconsolable at being deceived by our enemies and betrayed by our friends, yet still we are often content to be thus served by ourselves.”, (François de la Rochefoucauld, French classical author, 1613-1680).

I guess, in a way, it relate so much to me. xo.

monster

2009-12-14T02:55:00.005+08:00

upon talking about monster, one has to admit that, no matter how good you are, you still have a he-wolf/she-wolf, somewhere inside. and no matter how hard you try to keep it down, at times, it will rise, and cause lots of damages.

it brought us to another subject. damage. how hurtful can the simple word, 'damage' be? well, its very painful, if you asked me. to let ur trust goes on for someone, and been betrayed by that someone, all in the same time, ur expecting someone else who did that. and to think that he even have the guts, to not admit it. and lies about it. what a creepy monster. one that should have never been let out, or else he will wander, and broke people's heart and lives.

now then, there's heart. heart is, of course, the center of it all. AlFatihah is the heart of Quran. Heart is the nucleus in plants. but, in other context, heart is what we feel, what we perceived, what we are strongly attached to. but then. what if the heart gets burned, by all the previous hurtful stuffs? what happens, if people, with unreasonable mind, say all the terrible things in your face, and blame u for that? what happen if they go, and just simply invade your privacy, expecting you to believe whatever reason they gave u? what happens if a mother simply put other child as a priority, compared to others?

now, what will happen, if all this happen? what happens to the tiny little heart?

it sorta made me wonder. is the monster suppose to teach us lesson? is it the karma : what you give, is what you get back? of course, the monster in form of ourselves, is much more worst, indeed. but what if, it cames in others' body?

now, i know i may not be perfect, and lack in much more. but i really hope this monster realizes what they did to me, and how bad they have made me feel. sometimes people just have to accept, it is not always about the monsters that they are, but to find the bit of 'angels' in themselves.

OH!
a)Happy 20th Birthday to Badrul Muzammel. Have yourself a good 20, next year!
b)My result is out. Though something did bother my mind about it, but there are other things i wanted to be thankful for. Alhamdulillah, and a very thankful for everyone who has helped me, to this extent. Lecturers, friends, families.
;)

dear friends

2009-12-03T14:40:00.004+08:00

Well, it may be waaaayyyy bit late, but I am wishing Ahmad 'Aqrabain, or Kobby Fierce, a Very HAPPY 20th B'day, on, well, last Sunday, 29th of December.

May you have all that you desired in life, (including the pilot interview + job), and May Allah blessed you, all the way. Keep the Fierce on, and Boys Aloud shall rise! ;)

And I hope you like that little surprise party we throw.(Sdey tade background music!)

As for Mel, always the fabulous one, well, in less than a day, you are flying off to Hong Kong. Have a great, safe, nice trip. Have fun, all the way, and don't forget to bring up some goodies! I'll be waiting for that.

As for the rest of the friends, rumours has it, the result will be out, on 10th, or 13th. Either way, I am wishing the VERY BEST of luck for all.

;)

long holiday.

2009-12-03T11:27:00.004+08:00

.with Emynor. at Jusco. sigh. but the tree's from wasted botlle. kinda cool. ;)

.Fikri.

. Invitation to, Castle.
hola! been long, since last updated.
hm.
well, it has been solid three weeks now, and it's December, which means holiday.

And it has already been 18 days of holiday, and I am doing totally nothing. Not that I wanted to be a lazybump, its just, that was my plan. to have a GREAT holiday, cooped up in room, and savoring the holiday with movies, Gossip Girl rerun, besides hanging out.

And I've done that, and its getting pretty bored already. Well, I did go out. Duh, one can see through the pictures. But, it is just not the same anymore. Mel's working, and Fikri's studying and focusing on his other friends. Hm. Surely, it has all been different now.

I missed my old life. My 2007 life. Free. Can't care less. Bitchy when I wanted to, Nice when I decided to. Haih. I had always wondered, what will it be like, had I not left for Malacca? I took the road, and I've lost so much along the way. :(

Well, no need to get all moody up, aite? The holidays are still long enough.

sick and tired.

2009-11-08T13:22:00.002+08:00

of people ruining other people's lives.
of people talking back.
of people pretending to be all nice, all in the same time, macam haram.
of having to consume all your wants, for the sake of others.
of people being humble, all the while does not even mean it.
of people doing mistakes, and do not dare to apologize.
of myself, because i've turned into most of this.

of being in a place that taught all this.

3.

2009-11-03T18:46:00.002+08:00

Britney spears, three? nah. 3 more papers to go, then, buhbye Malacca, for now. Currently, the clock show 6.45 pm, and its 3 November, and I still have 3 more papers to go through. hey! it's a deep 'kebetulan'. haha.

well, i CANT wait to finish all this up, and escape from the plasticness of people. okay, im no good, as i did have my plasticity, but try to remains as true as possible. ugh. fuck them. when it comes to study, "jomlah, datang bilik aku, study. and bawak past year papers" but when it comes to going out and have fun, "um, kitorang tade malam esok", "bestnyee pegi hari tu, lepak2 dalam khemah". double fuck.

and as my facebook status said, 'people using people, people not strong enough to resist", bla bla. hm. i dont know. that is why, i just felt sick and want so much for the holiday to come, where i dont have to face all this kids-like people.

and for those said, "kene pondan and macam ko baru boleh dapat dl lah. mane ade orang laki dapat dl". ugh. triple fuck! then, why on the first place you EVEN applied for Masscom? !

okay, acap! enough whining. haha. i've currently finished up my second papers. next is on Sunday, followed by wednesday, and next sunday. then, the bus will be picking me up at 3, then so long, Malacca, and hello, KL!

let the days come early!
;)

time flies by, and now, its another 'end'.

2009-10-24T12:50:00.003+08:00

I just read Mel's blogs, and I realized, I've missed out SOO much. The Raya reunion, the Prty, and almost like, everything. And I missed everything about KL.

Here, everything is just about assignment, and dramas within it, and the tensions surrounding it. and the Tests. Now, its over though as Thursday, 10.25pm marks as the day where all the assignments have been done, and the test is done, too.

Now, to wait for the real Final Exam. Starting this upcoming 28hb, till 15haribulan sebelas. Cepat2 lah time flies.

Hm. Its been a loooong time, since I last updated this blog of mine, that I dont even know what to talk about. I lost my earfones, membuuat assignment groupworks ('so called') sorang2. and presentations yang amat banyak. but for the Publishing which we interviwed Pesona Pengantin @ KarangKraf, we got 'The Presentation of The Day'.

Hm. Nothing much to wite. Mel, I MISSSEDDD U LIKE HELL. KL, I KNOW UR MISSSING ME, TOO. and FAMILY, I LOVEEEE U GUYS!

and everyone.
WISH ME THE BESSSSSSTTTT OF LUCK IN THE FINAL PAPERS!

AND TO EVERYONE ELSE YANG AKAN AMIK PAPERS, WELL, THE VERY BEST OF LUCK! dO YA BEST!

*im ashraf, and im out!*

sepi, tapi berisi.

2009-09-24T22:31:00.007+08:00

*at Karangkraf, Shah Alam*
*the printing processes of books @ magazines*
*yanie and me, at HotFM*
*with Mr Sufian. he's cool, man!*
*during interview session*
.the classmates and Esther.
.crazy classmates.

That's how i'd describe myself. well, motifnya, adalah sebab aku dah tak berblog selama, entahla. last time i wrote, i was in library, and later that night, have broadcast test coming up. well, its been weeks now. lots has happened.

Hm. to kick things off, i have gone to Sri Pentas, Bandar Utama on 11th September. Yay! For assignment, of course, but still, its Sri Pentas. And the place is cool! I personally would like to be there, myself, working. Though the interview with Mr Sufian Isa, the producer of Gangstarz, saw conflicts between our group members (car problems, prayer's problem), we still goes and the result was not bad. Even mr Sufian was kind, he even texted me Hari Raya wishes, well, that's for another blog.

We saw Tini as she was in conti at HotFM. Then Karam Singh Walia, Michelle and Nas Ahmad of Melodi. We later break our fast at One Utama. Least we got what we're looking for.

Oh. And the crazy people of DMC4A, after 4th semester, finally break fast together, on 2nd September 2009. Best and Happening! That's all I can say. Overnight and straight to class during Ramadhan? Well, it was something.

Next, the interview for Publishing and Media Design, yet another subject we had to interview people. Lots of credits being spent, lots of negotiation being done, lots of fights and disagreements, after some time, on September 14th, we made our way to Shah Alam to interview those people of Karangkraf. This was not my choice. And personally, I still objected to it. The reason they want to do the interview before Raya, is because, "smue orang dah interview, kita belum". fuck.

And as always, i have to do everything. asking, and borrowing camera. and providing extra money. while a particular group member, refused to go on Monday, of which we dont have class just because, "nak dating dengan awek". causing four other people to miss two classes on Tuesday. double fuck. the pictures shows the process of interviews. well, may be its not that bad. i got to know their printing processes, how they edit pictures, the location of Karangkraf itself.

Well, after all those crazyincidents, and much fasting, i finally made my way to KL on Wednesday evening with Zilla. It was raining when i came home. But I am still glad. Kat KL dah, and about to Raya! yay!

Test, Oh Keep That Coming!

2009-09-07T12:50:00.002+08:00

Ugh! Malam ini, MId Term Broadcasting! Then, Wednesday, then Thursday, then Sunday. Hugh. And I just read through. Tak bace habis. When the feeling of laziness taken over, well. Haish.

For everyone yang rase2 Masscom @ UiTM Malacca, well, Good Luck for every Papers! Takut kot! Tak sabar tunggu cuti raye. Been missing KL like HELL already! xD

signing off, acap yang cute. haha.

*p/s~ SERIOUS takut malam nih. .

Success is simple. Do what's right, the right way, at the right time.

(someone names Arnold H. Glasgow once said).

52nd Independence Day!

2009-08-31T01:36:00.007+08:00

*Tunku Abdul Rahman, Bapa Kemerdekaan*

*Lots of Successes by Our Own Malaysian*

*The New Theme, 1Malaysia: RAKYAT DIDAHULUKAN - PENCAPAIAN DIUTAMAKAN*

HAPPY 52ND INDEPENDENCE DAY, MALAYSIA~!

The clock shows 1.43 am, of 31st August 2009. Almost two hours after Midnight. And it's Monday. And it's Independence Day. For 52 year now. I got less to say, since well, Merdeka is defined by, each person themselves.

I remember, back when the Schools days, we have competitions, dramas and all. And fireworks, of course. And of course, the subject of Sejarah itself. Though I don't have any trouble with history, at times, it does get pretty boring. Maaf ya, Puan Chua dan Cikgu Roslina.

Okay, enough about school's memoirs. As far as I am concerned, Malaysia is a GREAT country. The cultures, the races, the people, customary, the foods, the beautiful places. Ah! Its just, I don't know. breathtaking. Though we had our differences and downs, I wouldn't change it for anything.

I LOVE U, MALAYSIA. BIG KUDOS GOES TO EVERY PERAJURIT NEGARA, BANGSAWAN, SENIMAN DAN UNTUK SEMUA MALAYSIAN! LONG LIVE MALAYSIA!!!

*p/s ~ For references, visit this site. http://phoenity.com/hibiscus/articles/independence_malaysia.html. Sure does have some info on Malaysia!

Family First, Then The Rest

2009-08-30T15:30:00.002+08:00

This was the lesson I learned, these past three days. First, when I came back in KL, in Friday's afternoon, I went straight to masjid for Friday's Prayer. Then, I was initially supposed to picked Mel up, since it was his last day of Internship. Then, he canceled it off. I was left doing nothing but online.

Then, around 5, Mom got back from work. Said that couple of my cousins gonna be breaking fast also. Then, I cancelled the plan to get my hair cut and went rempit-ing to Bazaar Ramadhan @Setiawangsa. Its been looong since I came there. Met Mel there.

Then, during the 'Sesi Berbuka Puasa Bersama Cousin', di rumah je pun, barulahh aku tahu. Cousin aku yang sorang ni, akan fly kembali ke France 2pagi, Sabtu. Nasib baik aku balik. Bolehlah berjumpa, walaupun memang niatku ingin hantar sekali ke airport.

Sabtu.
Tidak buat apa apa juga. Maaf ya, kawan kawan, aku tak mengikut selebrate Birthday si Kembar. Petangnya, ke rumah cousin yang sama. Said our last Goodbye, for now. Wishing him a VERY GOODLUCK! Semoga dpat Degree dengan elok dan cemerlang! Dan aku juga ke kubur ayahku. Di petang yang hiba. Dengan alunan azan Asar. Syahdu di kubur. Bila pula aku dapat ke sana.

Tapi yang bestnya, aku bawa kereta pula har ini. Haha. I LOVED KL!

Malamnya, barulah aku dpat beita dari kawan kawan. Shariman sedang berlepak di restaurant. Aku cancel. Koben di BTS, rumah cousinnya. Dan Mel dengan, well, the outing and the drama. Haha. Mlamnya baru aku merempit lagi ke rumah Mel, mengahanta gambar. It was short anyway. 2 pagi hingga jam 3pagi. Dengan baliknya, di'sound' seorang polis muda.

Polis: Mana helmet? Rumah katmane ni?
Aku: Takde. Rumah kat Bunga Raya. Dekat je.
Polis: Dah dah. Pegi balik. Ni buat ape malam2 kat sini?
Aku: Nak balikla ni. Hantar barang kat kawan.

I just don't get it. Memanglah salah aku. Di depannya tapi, ada kereta melanngar lampu hijau, jalanku. Di mana polis tadi? Hm. Meronda katanya. Ingatkan aku ni mencuri motor ke?

Tapi apa apa pun, bagiku, family adalah segalanya. Terutamanya ibuku, adikku (yang dah mula menjadi baik dan bercap. yay!) dan abangku.

4th Day, And Still Surviving

2009-08-25T13:27:00.002+08:00

It's the Second day of the week, fourth day of Fasting. And I am going strong, or weak. Hugh. I dont know. It felt weird though. A year ago, we were this young child, only finishing First Semester, Happy to be, well, in class. Then, a year later, it was like, we are forced to be 'the seniors', one that has grown up. Hmm. Thestudy itself, doesn't intrigued much to me. Loss of Will, I guess.

Oh, updates in my life?
Nothing much. Made up with the room mates. but won't let myself get so close to them. Might take a while, before I really ito all that Hu-ha with them. And Economic Quiz, well, it was HARD! Now for tomorrow's test. Hopefully I'd do well!

Then, of course, I am excited of coming back to town, later this week. Been a while since I last came back. And to be able to break the fast with Kurma, Gosh! Empat hari, and aku tak jamah kurma langsung. Hmm. Turutmerindui masakan ibuku. Heee.

Oh, and there's rumours going on, JPA result nak kua dah. Tapi, seperti aku check di laman sesawangnya, tiada pun. Hopefully aku dapatla. Aminn.

Ramadhan 'al Mubaraq.

2009-08-21T08:59:00.004+08:00

People, shout out! Whoa!
Been like forever since I last updated this site, or any of that matters. Almaklum, busy dan tiada Internet connection di Malacca ini. But I'm here now. Hah!

Hm. It's that time of the year, again. Ramadhan. I always love it. It's like, my entire self is being cleanse up. The Tarawih, the Fasting, the Mood itself. Yay! OK, talk about being Ustaz. Haha. Well, lots has being going on. People knowing the real me, getting in a 'silent' fight with the room mates, stepping down from KOMED, befriended with Dhaus, one that I got into fight. Lots more. It is true, what people said. Words are soo much easier said than done.

Well. It IS the First Day of Ramadhan. It was a bit weird, the first day of Ramadhan, in Malacca, without My Lovely Mom. Hm. No matter. I will still be coming home, next week. Can't wait for the Merdeka Holiday.

What's more on me for the past weeks? Well, nothing much. Thursday, went to Sagil, Gunung Ledang. It was a beautiful waterfall. Thanks classmates for such joyful day. I am over responsibilities, now. About to take TWO Economy Test next week, and just enjoying what little beauty of my life. Least, I still have Azzah to be thankful for.

As for the Ramadhan, I would like to wish all, a very Happy Ramadhan. May this year's Fasting Month turned us up for the better. And may we will be a better person, in days to come. Thousand apologies for everything. May the Fast will be worthful and blessed by Him.

.Special Site for My Friends.

Mel.
*I missed you. A Very Good Luck in the LAST week of your Internship. Nok! Habis dah kau, kan. Haha. Congrats! I always knew you'd pull through. Bersabar menunggu aku Jumaat depan, ya?

Koben.
*Be strong. I've come to know you, for more than a year now. We've come SOO much together. I knew e had our differences, but I love you as a friend. a Best friend. And I knew you will pull through, too. Hold on, there. There's reason for everything. Chaiyox2!

Wasn't Me.

2009-08-12T21:37:00.003+08:00

"It Really Is Tiring, Living a Lie. So I Decided Not To. But Then, People Hate Me Now. Oh Well, I DONT CARE. Or Trying Not To. What the Fuck. It's Myself and My Mom That Matters."

Thursday's Fever!

2009-08-11T16:16:00.002+08:00

I woke up, feeling sick. The head was all heavy, the body was weak, not to mention, coldness all over. Last night meeting went slightly longer than what i assumed it to be. And while EVERYONE was doing something, i sat, and not contributing anything. as usual. After all, for my part, I was to do the registrations.

Met with the faces that will substitute us. Some of them, they ARE GOOD. Having asked "Sdh tk?", by Syerie, hm. IDK. maybe I am. a bit.

Today, however, those classmates of me decided not to come. to AGM. frankly, not all that excited myself. plus, with PKPP going on. and the fact that I am i cold right now in the library. GOSH.

Two great things happen though.

a*Daus talked to me, for the first time, in this very sem.
b*Publishing quiz was postponed, for next week.

Adding things up, I missed KL, shisha, my mom, Mel, Kobain, Streamyx.
;(

Us Crazy Kids.

2009-08-01T18:53:00.004+08:00

Aloha Bloggers.
Hm, dont have much to say. a week in malacca, well what d'ya expect? UES- like life? hah! keep dreaming. but this we, week has been quite, exciting, i guess.

*Isnin*
Arrived at Malacca, around 11oclock. takpaham ape yang Miss Shahiszan ajar ECO. penat dan balik tido. gerimis dan hujan pla membaluti tubuh! enaknya tidur! kemudiannya, ke KFC bersama room mate. seronok dibelanja. haha.

*Selasa*
Tiada apa sangat. Bergegas ke library seawal 9 lebih. Print proposal Publishing. 'Laskar Pelangi'. haha. Petangnya, Broadcast pula. Bosan since Azah tidak pulang lagi. Risaukan dia. Taknak dia quit. Echa surh tanya kan proposal tak pergi. Busy gile, kot. Cut me some slack.

*Rabu*
Eco lagi. Masih tidak faham, Walaupun baru Chapter Dua. Demand dan Supply adalah amat susah, OK! haha. Makan di Medan Selera Lendu bersama budak kelas. Thank God. Walaupun ada sekelumit drama dengan budak kelas yang satu, yang lain, OK je. hee. Kelas Advertising tiada. Yay! Ke library bincang tajuk Modern Issues. Berniat puasa Syaaban untuk esok. Duit dah habis! Tambah masalah, tak pergi meeting KOMED. Setiap kelas hantar satu/dua wakil. Siapalah kelas aku yang nak.

*Khamis*
Lambat ke class Modern Issues. Lucky dapat lecturer datang lagi lambat. Habis kelas, balik bilik. Boom kejap. Kurang tidur. 12.15, made way to tangga library. Turn out, keluar juga ke Melaka, walaupun puasa. Haha. Karaoke dua jam, Movie Setem. Watson. Buka di Borahan. BEST! thanks bunches Kerel, Namot, Yanie and Fika. Bump into Faiz. Missed him! Malam, induction Part One di block. Best. Tapi Part One agak kerek.

*Jumaat*
Kelas Publication. Lambat lagi. 8.30 kelas, bangun pada 8.24pagi. haha. Nasib baik Mr. Rusydi. Dapat assignment. F1, for this semester. Friday prayer. Then, ada plan keluar. But being me, aku taknak overnight. The others, like forcing me too. Hmm. Around 9.30 mlm lebih, barulah dapat kereta. Malam di Pengkalan Balak. Sotong goreng dan Benjo. Sedap. Cuma 'mood' dirosakkan oleh 'Pondan Psiko'. Haha.

Days Belong To Us.

2009-07-26T22:53:00.001+08:00

*the scenery at KLCC's waterfront. thanks Google*

It was Friday. And I was here. Kalau dah namanya Friday, mustilah ke club. Mel pun dah lama plan untuk ke club. Aku pun dah buat serba sedikit persediaan. Dan Fikri juga telah memujukku supaya pergi. Tapi kesian Mel. Akhirnya, tak menjadi. First, aku tiba tiba TingTong. Mana taknya. Paracetamol 2, Selsema 4. Gowd. Pengsan terus. Second, muncul kerisauan yang akan ada Rush. Takut juga. Sedar2, muka kami di dada akhbar dan ibubapa datang menjemput di Balai Polis. Third, and most foremost, duit pun sudah kurang. Biasalah. Students dan Interns. Nak expect apa?

Jadi, cancellah malam Jumaat tu. Dan aku, sambung tidur. Around 1, though, suddenly my brother called up to me. Unfortunately, we had a short circuit. Our house only. And the fuse is burned, with a real fire coming up. It was scary. The consequences? We didn't have electricity up to 3pm on Saturday. Poor my mom. She spent yet another amount of money to pay for the fix.

Saturday, I texted Mel in the morning. He seemed unwillingly to go out. But later on, I got that usual surprised call, saying Koben on his way and we're going round. What planned as 'Jusco' at first, took us up to KLCC park. Did some Camwhoring, a remade of Ciara's Work and we're off to, pasar malam au3. Bumped into some of my old classmate. Suddenly it's like an unplanned reunion. gosh.

Koben sent me and Mel back home. But I'm pretty sure that there's more. After all, Mel have been saying about Mali's, couple of times. As on queued, Mel asked to get ready. 15 minutes. I was expecting his car, but instead Wira came. Alyn. Koben's BFF. She's cute. And really nice. Made our way to Mali's. Missed that place myself.

Shisha time! We had that Transform flavor. Don't know what it transforms us too. Then, as I bought the drinks (for the second round. hee), Alyn came. We talked and I got to know her better. She's really cool. I even invited myself to M.O.S. haha. tak malu! Then a question popped out, "The guys came already?". "Yea". GOD! majal pulak!

Then, as we arrived to the table, of course, I just HAVE to humiliate myself. hee. and it went on till 4 o'clock. Luckily Alice made a stop to our table. Least, she's one person I know. As time passed, I was getting tired. The guys, Alyn, they're all cool. Just, guess its time to be at home, already.

After much contradictions, we finally on our way home. I was being a total bitch. sorry, kobain! But, the night was quite good. Got to thinking, in order for me to get ting tong, all I need is an SKL *Cherry*, Two Shisha *Transform + Love*, Lots of Drinks *Teh O Ais* and Out till 5am. haha. Although, being me, I kept silence most of the time, I quite enjoyed it. MUCHOS GRACIAS to Mel, Kobain, and Alyn. And the Boys, *Muiz, Shamin and Arill* (hope i got it right).

Oh, no pictures of any of the above mentioned incidents. Later will update it.
xD

Muffin's Story.

2009-07-26T20:35:00.000+08:00

*Amcorp Mall - Mel's Intern. LC, anyone? Haha*

*10th Floor, I tink. And if you could see, the Beautiful Park*

Dear bloggers.
Hey. hm. my one-week holiday are coming to the end. will be back to lendu, malacca and beloved (ke?) uitm tomorrow moning. havent been able to update this for a while. well, nothing's to write about.

Where to start, eh? oh, i know. after the not so long silent squabble with my mom, i decided to let it go. parents. thanks to those who gave me advises. you know who you are. all righty then, wednesday. i was planning to pick Mel up, from his office at Amcorp Mall, Taman Jaya. Shocking news, he's kinda injured himself. Luckily it was nothing.

So the pickup went the day after. Thursday. I was kinda late, at 5pm. And fasting that day. And did not offered a lady, a seat. Kinda felt terrible, but then it was packed train. Gosh. Arrived Amcorp Mall around 6. Mel havent finished his job yet. So there I was, waiting. After 10 minutes, sorry to say, I think I've finished the whole Mall. Then Mel came, we kinda huha huha at The Park and we dined at a&w. And, on our way back, we saw this 'nok' with a bling2 on. haha.

We met Alice for a while. She's pretty as she is. Always. Mel is resitting his paper. Best of Luck to him. I wanted him to hold that scroll and pursue studies. And, as for Jiha. Haih. It really is complicated, when you are close to someone. And you like that person, and she/he is not really what you wanted him/her to be. Hm. Muffin. If you know what I mean. Oh, and Mel DID give me muffins. Tasty-licious.

Parents Is Not Perfect.

2009-07-21T19:06:00.000+08:00

parents: they thought they did the best for us. send us away to college. gives us pocket money. told us not to do drugs. tell us to pray 5times a day. and having done all that, they thought they have done the best and provided enough for us.

well, here's a reality. they dont! they are not perfect, just like us.

Mother : Go buy some durian. Go use ur old folks' motorcycle.

Son : Umm. . .

Mother : Why? Are u afraid? U have to start the bike. Or else it would not be working after.

Son : (Sigh). Okay.

One hour Later.

Mother : Yay! You brought durian.

Son : Hmm. . (Panting heavily and replacing the now torn plastic of Soya). U really should give me a bike. .(murmuring).

Mother : How much did you spent? No worry, I'll pay you back. (So caught up in herself that she doesnt realize other things).

The drama above shows what happened to me, and reflect so much drama that has happened in the past, and is still happening, not only to me, but to every son/daughter out there, i believe.

Ibu hanya tahu, anaknya bawa kembali durian. Apa yang terjadi di tengah2, di tengah One Hour Later, ibu tak tahu. yang anaknya hampir excident, yang anaknya begitu malu kerana lambat gile start motor, yang anaknya terpaksa tebal muke mintak duit tukar. yang plastik air soya terkena durian. yang anaknya kene tanya mane durian yang okay.

dan semua tu, kerana apa? kerana pada dulunya ibu berkata,

Tingkatan 4:
Mother : Takpayahla bawak motor. Takpayah amik lesen. Nanti ligat tak belajar.

Masa Masuk UiTM:
Mother : Takpayah la bawak motor. Nanty excident.

Masa Tengah Belajar:
Mother : Takpayah. Nanty lain jadinya. tak belaja. Nanty dah keje, beli je lah.

GOWD!! For Pete's sake! motor dah lunyai pon. dahla. aku bengang and taktau nak tulis ape. its just, im FREAKING MAD.

another one of those post.

2009-07-16T17:38:00.000+08:00

dont wanna say much. just view the link.

http://www.utusan.com.my/utusan/info.asp?y=2009&dt=0716&pub=Utusan_Malaysia&sec=Dalam_Negeri&pg=dn_07.htm

not what it seems.

2009-07-16T17:12:00.000+08:00

hm. rumours has it that our uni case has gone even in the newspapers. everyone was like, rather mad at the pengarah kampus. as he keeps saying, "kita okay. kita tak bole close". fuck!

honestly, i really dont care. i mean, yeah, it is about our health. dan kami berada di tempat yang, casenya dah pun mencecah 10 orang. lecturer, di pihak yang lain berkata, "semuanya masih terkawal. mungkin disebabkan construction".

again. i dont really care. yang nyata, bebudak nih, nak cuti. aku pula, bukannya aku tak mahu pulang. dan bukannya aku mahu kan kematian. tapi, aku percaya, as long as you know how to take care of yourself, not expecting anything, and not exposing yourself to the threat, you are going to be just fine.

tapi tulah. di samping kesibukan orang berH1N1, aku pula terperangkap dalam drama lecturer. "macam bodoh". the lecturer even said. bukan nak mengata, tapi cuma mahu menegur. dan kerana aku terlampau baik, aku hampir kantoi, di mana, ada kondom dalam laciku. and my roomies think all that is funny. FUCK!!

ikut hati. aku mahu saja pulang. release tensi. lupa masalah. tapi bukan sekarang. biarlah KL merindui aku, dan aku rindukan KL juga.

those who read, do pray for all of warga uitm, a bright pink of health. and for things to get soo much better.

xD

not that old drama, again!

2009-07-15T21:00:00.000+08:00

hm. its been two weeks now, i am here. in lendu. well, i almost got my jpa from completed. big thanks to my momma! and now, for the freshies induction. they always goes, "asal ko kene buat semue keje?", or " aku nampak ko sorrang je buat keje". well, i beg to differ. in KOMED, it is more of a groupwork. but to hell! most ajk pon tak buat keje. but since this the last semester, im gettin all out. and once dah habis everything. GOODBYE!

as for my romantic stuff, i dont know if my zodiac says otherwise. but it has been great. VERY great in fact. i got a call from S around 7 today. and finally get the ball to date with J, yesternyte. up till 2am. oh gosh! heee. but i am still sticking up with the old plan. stay single. avoid drama (at least try to). and be Acap. all the way.

the only thing is, i have a really hard time with classmate. maybe two of them. and as for room mate. haih! do i even need to tell? one of them wanted to make me jealous. but, why would i be. its life as it is. and im living it. and i really not looking forward for any drama, this semester. although i sense that i've already gotten myself into. a drama involving lecturers? woopseyh!

oh, oh. and after meeting peeple and, engaging myself in drama, (of which i did not even asked for), i thought od the saying. "its a crazy world, and we're the crazy people who's living it".

a scholar: to get or not to get?

2009-07-10T15:39:00.001+08:00

of course, my answer would be the latter. but then, how would i apllied, if the Internet connection here in Lendu is so slow. gosh! i really hoped for the scholarship. i want it. hell, i need it! to support me. and my studies. and my necessities.

with the not-so-good result of mine. well, hopefully i will still get it. right now, with big help from mel, i hoped i would be able to made this, work.

oh, and after a week here. i am officially the most boring person on earth. or maybe here. i am bored, and my bored show through. and people see me as, well, boring. hee. the lectures pretty much went the same. in fourth semester now. and couldnt wait to finish all this. this semester, lots of killer subjects, too. Economy, Math anyone? ugh! and Publication, and Advertising. which involves designing and all. of which i know, im sucks at.

gowd! i just hope i could do well. and my grades will be, at least slightly better than last semester. InsyaAllah.

we're the saturdays.

2009-07-05T23:55:00.000+08:00

spotted, A and M having a boys day out, surrounded by the public at BB. boy, arent they a cute pair? wonder why the other bestiest, Kobain, never made it? what's up, K? the folks just dying to know the reason of the sudden left.

haha. berangan japs.
well, we do hv a great time. but, let me tell u the whole story, shall i?

it all started last week, or before, the idea of going Ice Skate, at Sunway Piramid. i never been there, frankly. so, i really wanted to. and Iceskate? hell yeah! after all, it IS the last hang out, before we're off to campus, again. me and koben, that is. the initial plan was for us to get up at 11am, get to cut Mel's hair, and hang, anywhere.

due to last nyte late's sleep, i only woke up at 11.30am. dress up, oh, i finally wear the shirt Mel specially buy, as my Birthday's gift. thanks, bitch! it was cute! and there we were, at K Quick sometink, watching, and waiting patiently, for Mel to get his Rihanna's do's. it was real cool though. dont u tink. afte all that biting, R, u really shd hv move over. made way to Riha-mel! haha.

so, since the cut take soo long, the hang was cut short. but hey. we're young and restless. we hv fun, anywhere, everywhere. so,there were we. arriving at Sunway. except for the Ice Skate, the place, was a bit, duh. but i get to taste this delicious nasi lemak, by Pappa Rich. it's a must have!

we beat the trafic, and hit BB. sadly, Koben has got to go. as Mel wishes, i wish ur problems will be ok, now, Koben! ur th fierce one, of course u'll sort it out!

as the nyte still young, me and Mel, strolled around Pavi and BB. it was GREAT! even though there a LOTTS of people, but it was a great day. Pavilion, rocks! BB is GREAT! we even snap with this candy Model. haha. it was WAY cool. met up with Pidot, of whom i barely knew.

after all that excitement, i finally hit home at 10pm. it was the second last time im meeting with Mel. kinda sad, since all this fun will be limited. but no worries. KL will have me. at least part of me.

*p/s - although i didn get to skate, what matters is my bestiest, Mel and Kobain. i have great times! im nobody without u guys. xoxo.

kl, goobye. malacca, hell-oh!

2009-07-05T23:33:00.000+08:00

whoa! it had been quite some time since my last post about the father's day. and it had been weeks since dad's day. i do have bits of excitements, last weeks. but, not feeling up to write about it.

so, there i was. at the end of holiday. and everything's a fucked up! selasa, i was accompanying Fikri to cut his hair. and i was practically forced by him to follow his colleagues to Putrajaya. but, along the way, i did have fun. get to see places i never been. Puchong, and all those area. by the end of the day, i left my helmet, at his friend's car. dammit!

wednesday. i was in mydin, shopped for my stuffs. and purchased my ticket to Malacca for Monday. we hang. the usual Power of Three, me, Mel and Kobby. we watched Ice Age 3: Dawn Of The Dinosaurs, and it was SOO hilarious! and spending time with them, never boring. the only problem? i lose my ticket! dammit, two!

khamis. i went up to pay my studies' biil, at Bank Islam, at Taman Melawati (why cant it be one of them in Setiawangsa?!), and found out, my account has closed! dammit, three!

friday, well, the only thing that cheer me up, is today. as i went,(yet again), to Bank Islam to open new account, i met up with one senior of my block. gosh! im not even in Malacca, and i already seen some familiar faces. so, my journey kicked during the Friday's Prayer, (GOD! I have sinned!), with the ever undersatnding and cool Yanie and his Sister, and his Mom. we arrived Malacca, and register ourselves. it was quick. and bit fun.

as i was going back to KL, i get a call, from Azrill, my new room mates. as it turn out, i was on my way to KL, with yet another GREAT family. THANKS SOO MUCH, to all of you! and, as i arrived, i straighly called Mel, excited that it had all been over, and spent till 2am at his home, gossiping and onlining. who knows when would i do that again, ryte?

as for saturday, i'll tell in the next post. it's 9 minutes to 12 o'clock now. to monday. of where i should be in uitm malacca. but, being me, i always wait till last minutes to get there. and, yea, i will be missing KL, A LOTT! study would be hard, but, as one put it, no pain, no gain! and as mel says it, 'you gotta work, work!'

wish me best of luck, y'all. may the new semester will be a BLAST!
do wait for my next post. after all, who am i, without u guys.
xoxo. (berangan pulak. hee).

happy belated abah's day!

2009-06-25T01:53:00.000+08:00

although it might be a bit too late for the wish. well, here goes! HAPPY FATHER'S DAY TO EVERY DADDY, PAPA, ABAH, ABUYA, ABI, MAMU, et cetera et cetera.

walaupun untuk sebenarnya, aku tak tahu pun bilakah Hari Bapa yang sebenarnya. mulankehiya aku ingat, pada haad minggu kedua. tiba tiba, ahad minggu ketiga Jun pula. entah. apa apa pun, sayangilah insan bergelar ayah. kerana dia yang memberi kita kehidupan. walau teruk mana pun, sekurangnya, kita masih ada bapa.

aku ada berblog rasanya, tentang bapa, pada masamasa ini juga. dan its not my place to advise and give talk about how u shd value father and all. tapi trust me, ada bapa lagi best! someone to dedicated ur success to. someone yg akan sentiasa look out for u, so u'll always feel safe. someone to guide u.

hm. someday, aku akan jadi juga bapa. dan aku akan cuba menjadi bapa terbaik. PALING TERBAIK, untuk anak anakku. till then, aku akan berusaha keras untuk mendapat hidup mewah, bagi ibuku, familiku, and anak anak ku kelak. whoa! talk abt much much future plan. haha.

buat abahku, Mohd Hanafiah B. Othman, semoga dia berbahagia dan diredhai di sana, bersama adik adikku. al Fatihah untuknya.

those people handling it like shit!

2009-06-25T01:30:00.000+08:00

sorry to say this, but then, i just found out, my application of college suddenly dapat kolej lain. i was in kolej Lekir, currently, but then, when checked, i suddenly got my place in Tuah college. while i dont really hate Tuah, well, i have been in the same college, the same "tingkat", for one and a half year now.

knowing uitm's staff, well i probably shouldnt be mad. at this time of year, benda2 ni, biasa aje. but seriously, kalau betul pun, with the course registration pun have problems. what are those people doing there? and insentive makanan. it really is a necessity. since it can help us, real much. the rules said in order to register that incentive, we have to register the college first. but HOW am i supposed to do that, when i cant even register the college?

i dont want to be soo mad, but they are treating the students like well, shits. i can of course, not applying for the college. stay luar. but i dont want to be burdening my mom. poor her. she's got too much on her mind, already.

again, i want to say, if those in uitm want to use online system, well, do practise it well. if not, serious kate, ia hanya akan menyusahkan.

Poker Face.

2009-06-14T03:14:00.000+08:00

Kenapekah?!

aku begitu marah, sebab dah dua kali terpedaya. kenapa ada yang suka letak default pic mereka, gamabar yang hawt, padahal, in real life, tk lah hawt mane.

no, dont gt me wrong. aku okay dengan semua orang. segenap lapisan masyarakat. yang tak okaynye, kenapa perlu gambar orang lain, di profil. bila diminta ym, dipaksa tunjuk, yang sebetulnya, mengecewakan. aku taklah berharap akan Famous Celebrity bagiku. kerna aku sendiri tidaklah se"gah" mane.

tapi, sekurang kurangnya, do have a gut. letak gamba sendiri. aku salute orang yang edit. walaupun bukan gamba the reeal thing, at the very least it still shows, real thing. dari yang clearly dah letak gamba orang lain. and claimed to be him.

dan, frankly, soalan tu patut berbalas semula. KENAPA ADA YANG MASIH TERPEDAYA DENGAN TIPU HELAH LAPUK NIE? haha. i guess routine ku dah caught up to me.

;)

Rain On My Parade.

2009-06-13T23:41:00.000+08:00

yeap.
it was raining. fromkhamis, jumaat, and even today. and so does my heart. tklah my heart. im doing fine. hell. im doing great. having fun all the time, kat rumah. makan ditaja. keluar bila suka. that's what i love, being in KL.

"Biarpun kau begitu, hanya kaulah destinasiku...Kuala Lumpur".

the only rain is, well, my result, i guess. it's going down like hell. tak best. langsung tak best. macam kata Fazrul, "at least ko still DL, kan". tapi, entahla. aku bersyukur. SANGAT, SANGAT bersyukur. tapi jatuh yang teruk. almost 0.3. banyak jatuhnya. its not the "title" that im after. bukan bualan orang jugak. tapi, aku perlukan ini. untuk ibuku. familiku. adikku.

tapi, yang bestnya, aku dapat lihat result ku bersama Fikry. walaupun, entah. ia tak seperti yang ku harap lagi. mungkin tradisi ini tak perlu lagi, untuk sem hadapan. tapi, yang bestnya lagi. sebelum melihat result, aku sempat lagi berjalan bersama Shariman. dapat satu baju kemeja, and seluar. and it cost less. hee. and i can get to use my mic and earphone. and i got to taste that new KFC. unfortunately, tklah sampai mandi hujan pun. haha.

dan, setelah penat dan mahu mandi, Fikri telefon. dan kami pun pergi ke tempat lepak lama kami, CC Adam (di mana kami membesar. haha). and aku mendapat kejutan. entah. i guess aku dah terlampau biasa dengan Good result. mulai ini, aku perlu ~

a)humble
b)tak kisah orang nak kate ape.
c)BELAJAR, BELAJAR, DAN BELAJAR
d)dan BELAJAR tanpa tunggu last minute.

as the night still young, suddenly there's a plan of us, (Mel, Fikry and I) to go to club. haha. wanting to shake things off, aku pun tagged along. and it is HAPPENING. after not being there for almost 5 months, i guess. and i have fun. LOTS of fun. with Fikry, and Mel aje. and even though we're running late, but it was still hip and happening, and cool. and i met this young eighteen. sorry dude. but im over all this.

as we're heading home, kami berlepak di Barakah. and berjumpa rakan rakan Fikry. i guessed, memang dia dah moved on. and it is good for him. best juga lepak bersama mereka. cumanya, well, mereka adalah those yang cakap saja. jadi, tahan tahan je lah. dan 5.41 pagi, barulah ku tiba di rumah. PENAT!

Result DAH Kua!!

2009-06-11T19:03:00.000+08:00

And i AM freaking out!
Here I am, standing in front of my Auntie's computer. The full access to UiTM.edu, and I don't know. Maybe I am just FREAKING scared that I will not excel, this sem.

Usually, I will watched the result, together with my Bestiest, Fikri.
But he is away now, leaving me, all alone. Kesian juga pada dia. Excident. Nose Bleeding. "Acap, aku xcident mlm semalam. Teruk k. Smue pun teruk. Aku bedarah hidug, Yiq terseliuh . . .bla bla". Begitula mesej berbunyi.

Poor him.
Tapi aku masih perlukan seseorang untuk lihat bersama sama. Dan berkongsi, KEDUKAAN, atau Kegembiraan. Mungkin Mell. Atau Shariman.

And mungkin esok.
Takut!! Doakan aku, semua!

;)

.Not at Home, Again ;(

2009-06-09T23:16:00.000+08:00

Well, once again, I was at other people's house.
Now, it's my auntie's turn, here in Taman Cemerlang, Taman Melati.

The purpose?
To five pieces of advises for my cousin, who practically does not want to do anything. He has been to Institut Professional Baitulmal (of which I should be going), and fled away, and earlier this year, enrolled in KPM Sri Iskandar, Perak. Again, he fled. Now he was not doing anything except staying at home, daydreaming and getting out.

And I was suppose to help him. How? THAT is a question I can not even answer myself. I mean, here I am, all blonde, not doing anything, and basically just not the one to give advises. HOW CAN I?!

Haha.
But I am here, now. And will be here till Thursday, I guess. So I might as well have fun. At least tried to.

;)

Late That Nyte.

2009-06-08T10:08:00.000+08:00

After like, weeks spending timeless, hopeless days at home, well, the Boringness is getting to me. Well, who could be blamed, then? Orang yang tak mahu ambil aku kerja, atau aku sendiri yang tak berusaha bersungguh sungguh, atau keadaan?

Aku tak tahu, dan in truth, tak peduli. Cuti bagiku, adalah cuti. Extra pocket money would be fine, tapi, aku lebih mahukan pengalaman. Bekerja sebagai promoter, hmm. It's basically what I have done. Dont get me wrong. Aku menyukai kerja sebegitu. Cumanya, it is the experience I wanted. Mintak CiMB pun direject. Pengalaman gimana sih?

Sudahnya, apa yang aku buat, rutin harian (dan mingguan) ku adalah,

a)Bangun di kala 10 pagi, atau 11 pagi, atau 12 tengah hari.
b)Terus buka Chiko ku, dan beronline sampai 2, 3 petang.
c)Mandi kerana Zohor hampir sampai kemuncaknya.
d)Zati dan Si Mawas pada jam 4.30ptg.
e)Arianna dalam Matahari jam 6.30 ptg.
f)Malamnya, keluar atau menonton TV lagi.

Itulah rutinku.
Tapi ku gembira. Sekurangnya, masa di rumah lebih best. Haha.

Tapi bukan rutin bosan aku mahu story. Tapi berita gembira aku mahu kongsi.
Semalam, setelah berDanau Kota bersama Mel, dan Jiha yang as always, Beautiful dan Alice, aku pun online.

Rakan Ym ku untuk dua tahun (atau lebih) beritahu, result UiTM officially akan di announce, 11hb. Tapi, secara unofficially nya, aku boleh suruh rakanku itu check.
Tapi aku takut, adakah ia akan seperti dahulu? Mungkinkan aku kan jatuh? Ku beranikan diri dan beri number Matrix. Dan.

"Ape yang saya boleh kata, Tahniah!"

YEAY!! Bkan niatku untuk takabbur, tapi aku betul2 mahukannya. Untuk ibuku. Untuk kewangan ku. Untuk masa depan ku. Tapi that as far as it goes. Untuk result sebetulnya, ku masih menunggu seperti rakan rakan lain.

Apa apa pun, A VERY HUGE THANK YOU to DANIEL TEGISUKI. As for yourself, dont worry, it would turn out better, after this. Selempang kuning hanyalah sekadar selempang.

Arabian Night.

2009-05-27T14:06:00.000+08:00

.The Babrican Drinks.

.The Place Itself.

.Me With Shisha (Action Lebih. Haha.)

.My Bestiest and "Arie".

.It's Us. Sorry Sherie, Not in Here.

Tiba tiba aku teringat. Sewaktu Form 4, Pendidikan Islam, kita belajar tentang Andalus. Cordova. Tempat penyebaran ilmu islam. Dakwah Islam. Dan kenapa aku meningati semua ini kembali? Kerana Jumaat lalu, aku telah ke Andalus, bukan negara yang tersohor itu, tapi sebuah kedai makan. Okay, ia tidak lah seperti restaurant, memandangkan tarafnya yang, seperti kawanku, Shariman katakan, “Kat sini, semua budak Up Up. Aku ni, pakai seluar pendek aje”.

Haha. Memang tempat begitu tempat orang up-to-date. Aku? Memang tak sesuailah. Fikirku, tapi, aku mahu bersama kawan kawanku. Aku TAK kisah orang lain kata apa. Lagipun, itu adalah reunion kami (aku, Mel dan Shariman) bersama Arief Irsyad, yang sudah kami tidak jumpa sejak Jun 2007. The night, was a good night. Original plan nya, “Kita lepak area2 Setiawangsa aje”. Tiba tiba, Andalus, here we come. But it was worth it.

The only thing that spoilt it, was other people. Mel’s friends. Aku tak kata aku benci, malah, mereka kenal aku, dan aku pun gembira berkawan dengan mereka. Tapi, bila Mel jumpa mereka, dia seperti lupa kami. Maksudku, kita datang berempat, baliknya berempat lah juga, kan. Tapi, its Mel’s life. Aku pun faham. Dan the drama dengan Kobby. Humm. Aku bersalah kepadanya, aku tahu. Tapi berkali kali aku meminta maaf, dan dia tak berkata apa apa. Dan bila mel minta maaf, in an instance, mereka berpelukan. Di kala itu, aku sedar, tempatku bukan di sini. Ini tempat orang kaya.

Oh, patutnya aku cakap pasal malam itu. It was fun. Memorable. Even Arie (new name for Arief), had some dark side to tell. Kami bershisha, dan dua balang lagi. Lemon dan strawberry. Dan kami mencuba minuman Barbican, seperti dicadang oleh Mel. Bolehlah. Jam 1pagi, Shariman dan Arie dah terpaksa balik. Aku ikut serta. Dan baguslah. Tibanya di rumah, kepalaku berdenyut. Ting Tong.

.Dangerously In Love.

2009-05-21T16:23:00.000+08:00

This was one song, a person has once dedicated to me. Muchos Gracias.

Love? What is it, actually? Affection? Lust? Care? Real Feelings? Or simply just a tool to get what you wanted?

No matter how one defined it, it is a beautiful thing. Till it's gone, that is.

Having been in love twice, I guess Love is not for me, after all.

As for those have been hurt by me, well, I seriously does not meant for those things to happen.

Hari ni, aku sedar, I am a bad seed, and that Love itself was a Dangerous things to tamper with. Bila dah betul betul bercinta, memang susah nak lupa.

Masa sekarang ni, aku nak sendiri. Solo. Single. And gembira.

Again, THOUSANDS, THOUSANDS SORRY for those I have hurt. You know who you are.

Bits of Old Memoirs.

2009-05-20T13:11:00.000+08:00

Last Friday.

It was sort of a reunion Day. Well, at first, it just started with a usual Friday Prayer. Pretty Boring, even though it was just my second day in KL. Well, I was getting bored by spending all day at home, doing nothing.

Hahah.

So, my plan, for me and Shariman to go savoring that ABC at Kenanga we’re so craved about. As she texted Fikri, in no time, Fikri has arrived, and after a quick (well, not so quick, lah) change, there we were, at Pavilion. It was just like last year. During these times.

We even went to Carl’s. Of first I experienced with Mel and Kobby, last year. We even had a crazy photo shoot. Take a look at the pictures. It is CRAZY! Anyhow, ingatkan the excitement dah habis. But, as we’re reaching home, Mel texted. And suddenly, there we were, at Alibi’s.

At first, it was weird. We haven’t talked for soo long. Mel and I. in a way, I was quite hurt. But, as he willing to let it go, well, I might as well go along je. So, there we were. Alibi’s. At Setiawangsa. Yang kami tak pernah lepak. Shisha lagi. Best. And then, came Rahman, and his brother. Yang aku lupe nama die. Then, Hanaffy. After a while it was getting pretty hot. Semua pun dah merepek. Shisha effect, kot.

And, just then, I saw my old friend, from PLKN dulu. Aku tahu dia duduk Setiawangsa. Wan Hakimi tak silap nama dia. Tapi dia tak ingat aku. Sedih.

After, datanglah Syafiq Izwan and the gang. Iqbal. Aizat Azlan. Muaz. Setiawangsa School Reunion. Hahah.

11 o’clock, the party’s over. It was weird though. The feelings. Seeing old friends. Haha. Well, pictures said it best. So, lihatlah.


Bye Bye 3rd Semester

2009-05-18T13:09:00.000+08:00

It's over now.

The Final. The Tension.

Lots has been happening since the last post.

Tak taw nak start dari mane. Well, aku dah berada kat KL sekarang. The place that I once favor. But, after having been here for a while, Gosh. The Blankness and Boringness started taking its toll.

I tried Jobhunting, but the result was rather bad.

Tak dapat pun mane mane.

So, after my last paper, I did not go back, just yet.

Deep in my heart, there's a thing, I wish I would do. Least before the sem's over.
But I dd not get to do it. Which was, for me, a good thing, actually.

So there I was, at my room mate's auntie's house, in OZANA IMPIAN, Malacca. Till Wednesday. The house was fully ours, since his aunt was a teacher and would probably spent the whole day teaching.

The stay was rather good, either. We jogged at Taman Botanikal, watch movies at MBO (not going there, again), and the best part, I even bought my mom a skarf, for Mother's Day.

Well, after 5 months, the sem's over now.
I could only hope the result would turn out good.

:)

.One More to Go.

2009-05-04T17:07:00.000+08:00

Yeay~!!
Public relations is SOO last semester. Haha. Now, I am almost there, almost reaching Semester 4, and almost leaving all the past memories behind.

The paper was this morning, of which, tak dapat tidur dengan nyenyak, worrying sick about apekah yang bakal ditanya, susahkah soalan yang bakal keluar, masukkah apa yang aku baca ni, blah, blah. . .

Then came this morning. 6.30am. Bangun pagi, selepas hanya 3 jam lebih tidur, Subuh, dan terus kembali menelaah. Gila~!

Akhir minit belajar, tak kan semuanya akan masuk. Aku tak terlepas. Benci.
Tapi, semua dalam semua, agak berpuas hati. It went, hurmm, bittersweet.

Yang penting, tak sabar bercuti. Jumaat yang bakal menjelang, lagi EMPAT hari, dan aku akan free. FREE. haha. Oh, mungkin Isetan, Parkson, atau Estee Lauder bakal menantiku. Mungkin. But for now, I am sick of trying to be nice, when all of people wanted to do is Hurt. and No More.

Right Now, and Right Here, straight after KOMED is over, I am going to be SOO free, and to Hell with others. I tried to be the best person I could be, if you cannot live with that, then Sorry.

:(

p/s - (Kenapelah aku tulis benda merepek nie. Environment di Library UiTM kot. Haha. Tapi, memang gembira, now that PR is over).

Sisa Semester 3 di UiTM.

2009-04-29T21:40:00.000+08:00

Final, Final.

Semua orang pun tengah pening berFinal Exam. As for me, entahla. Semester ni, macam tak semangat, tak excited, tak best, tak confident. Ia bukanlah sesuatu yang bagus untuk dikatakan, tapi, entahla.

Pertama, Usaha. kemudian, baru Tawakal. Tapi, entahlah. CTU a.k.a Islam dan Komunikasi, ynag mana semester ini adalah yang terakhir, yang patutnya boleh buat yang terbaik, pun, ala Kadar saja.

Tapi, apa2 pun, aku mengharapkan yang terbaik. Insya Allah.

Esok, aku akan kembali ke Melaka. Menghabiskan sisa kertas exam. Dan menghabiskan sisa tugas sebagai Naib Setiausaha 2 KOMED, harapnya.

Banyak yang sudah berlaku, sejak aku last update blog ini. Tapi entahla. Untuk aku mengingati sendiri, pun begitu banyak.
Contoh manusia yang Lemah Ingatan ---> Ashraf Hafizuddin.

Cinta yang Kembali Bersemarak, Suka yang Baru Diputik, Menjadi 20 tahun, Sepuluh hari yang lalu, Cinta Pada yang Betul, Modelling Session, StoryBoard dan Grafik yang TAK menjadi, dan macam macam lagi.

For Jiha, I seriously like you, although we JUST met.

Semua itu, dalam lipatan Part 3. Dalam sejarah semester April 2009. Harapanku, Moga Penghujungnya adalah Bagus, dan Menarik, dan Ada Something REALLY GREAT, out of all this.

:P

Everlasting Friendship.

2009-04-29T21:24:00.000+08:00

That's what I like to think about my relationship with Mel. MY BESTIEST~!! He was the One person I care most, after My Family. He and Fikry.

He was the last one for me to be talking, before I went off to Malacca, last week.\
He was the first one for me to be seeing, straight after I arrived in KL, somewhere around two months ago.

He's the Best- EST Bestiest.

It all has gone to ashes, though.
My fault. He was asking me, practically dragging me, to go to Green Box Karaoke.
But. I wasn't in the mood.

Humm.

Plus, with Public Relation and Journalism Paper, coming up.
And tomorrow's Photoshoot for KOMED. Means I have to go bck early. Means no KL- time for me.

Sigh.

That's the price I have to pay.

Again, THOUSANDS, THOUSANDS, THOUSANDS, apologize for Badrul Muzzamil.
This is the only way I kne how to reach him.

:)

YOU REALLY, REALLY ARE, THE BESTEST BUDDY~!!!!

.Last Week is the Hectic-est Week.

2009-04-01T09:47:00.000+08:00

Two down, several more to go.
Assignment is due among the last weeks of study, of course.

And of course, the principle "Last Minute Work is The Best Work". Well, not necessarily, but that's what been practiced, by me myself.

Now that FesComm and Photo Gallery is over, things have been,less stressful for me.
But then, lots has happened since the last time this blog is updated. My brother was involved in accident, and I myself has just had my share of the same thing, last night.

Everything went so fast, and next thing I knew, I had already reach Masjid Tanah. It was like, the accident never happened. But the pain, Gosh. Now i knew, how does the four young students of Tuah, UiTM Melaka felt.

The incident taught me lots. But then, have we ever really take lesson, out of this? Hurhmm.

In the love side, well, I have develop feelings toward 5 persons. (Boleh tak 5 orang sekali. Haha.)

Tapi, it's just feelings, lah.

For days to come, presentations and assignments is on the way.

Hopefully, I would do my best, this semester, too.

:P

I Dont Know

2009-03-09T23:55:00.000+08:00

Kenapa lah aku masih mengharap? Single? And all these while. . .

Entahlah. Just, aku tak perlukan seorang yang bernama teman, for now.
Well, peliklah.

Dulu, "Kita ni ape?", "Would you be My Love?", "Xpelah, macam terpaksa je".
Sekarang, "Sory, busy tadi", "Fahamlah, ade event, study, bla bla. .",

Aku cakap bukan pasal diri aku, (je), but almost everyone pernah rasa. Bukan nak mintak simpati. Bukan nak jaja cerita. Bukan nak undang gaduh. Tapi, dah memang itu endingnya.

Walaupun "I don't know", aku still in a relationship, and aku tahu and aku sedar tu.
Tapi bagi parti lain, mungkin, "Aku dah single sekarang. Boleh buat apa aku mahu".

Aku menunggu waktu. Untuk sendiri. Untuk gembira lagi. Lama rasanya dah tak ketawa seikhlasnya, dan segirangnya. Jika aku tahu dan boleh ubah, inilah situasi yang akan berlaku.

Q: "Kita ni ape?", "Would you be My Love?", "Xpelah, macam terpaksa je".

A: "Kita kawan je. Not more than that. Sorry", "Humm, takpelah. I choose to be on my own, alone". "Dari menipu, lebih baik berterus terang".

Jahatkah dengan I don't know?
Hurhmm.

I just... Don't Know.

meeting people.

2009-03-09T01:14:00.000+08:00

The best thing about going to Pavilion, KLCC, Lot 10, and seangkatan dengannya, is that you could almost bump into semua orang. best lah.

setelah dua hari di rumah, hari ini, hari Ahad keluar.
Tanpa plan, tanpa rush, pergi saja.
Best. Pergi terserempak dengan Dyla.

Jumpa Katy. Jalan - jalan.

Jumpa Fikri, malu lihat rakannya yang semua vogue. And aku? Berbaju putih balut nangka, and berseluar koyak jeans.

Terjumpa pula Ash Mahfuz. Bercerita.

Last, Dyla and Shah. Lama sungguh sejak tak melabuhkan punggung di taman KLCC bersama mereka. Perkara yang pernah menjadi rutin harian.

Dan Zain. Rakan yang baru dikenali pada pukul 3 petang, dan dah mula berSMS pada jam 11 malam. Haha.

Dan sekarang Mel's. Amat Seronok.

KL memang seronok. I wish I could just stay here, forever.

"I Just Follow Them"

2009-03-04T10:42:00.000+08:00

Now what does this phrase, or rather four words, mean?
Simply, "I don't know what happened, I just goes along with the plans".

Now consider this, "F*** D****".

Its just too private to tell.
Kadang-kadang terfikir jugak, baek sangat kah aku ni? Suka membantu, fikir pasal orang lain. . .Tapi, apa balasan yang aku dapat? Apa balasan yang aku harap? Hurmm.

Pondan berangan terus berangan. Bilik yang suatu ketika seronok dan Thrilling, sekarang dah macam cibai. KL adalah pengubat duka. Rakan pon, semakin menghilang. Dicemuh, di caci. di hina. . Lumrah kott.

Sekarang, apa yang boleh di harap adalah semoga semester berakhir dengan cepat.

Tapi, best thing is, I know that there will always be one who loves me. And miss me.

Huu.

.Up and Down.

2009-02-27T14:21:00.000+08:00

'When a Window Closed, Another Door Open'

Does it really applies?
humm.
Ada kah 'window' untuk aku?
Door? Humm.
Tiada pun. Tidak sekelumit cahaya dari sebarang lubang pun.

Dramas Mountings, Friendships at Stakes, Studies on the Verge.
That's the life of mine, for the past two months.

Kenapa? Gowd. Ini balasan aku, mungkin. Mungkin cara-Nya untuk menguji. Untuk memberi yang lebih baik. Mungkin.
Sebagai manusia, kita tak lari dari silap. Tapi, entahlah.
Aku dah penat, dengan drama, dengan sikap manusia lain, dengan kehidupan di uitm.
KL adalah syurga dunia. Bagiku, lah.

Bukan berniat mendiskriminasi, tapi, semuanya begitu komplikated.

"One more thing, A*** dah taw pasal ko mesej ngan J**** ".

"Ko nie memanglah Acap, skema gile. Tak pyahala buwat smue tu".

"I still love you.. but.."

"Taw pon balek bilik, ingatkan x jumpe jalan balik dah".

Gosh.
It's all, so, very much untuk ditangani oleh seorang yang belumpun 20.

Bukan niat untuk come across, bukan niat untuk menyepi, tapi, entahlah.
Dengan gambar direject. Dengan pondan2 berangan. And, seorangan menghadapi semua.
Gila, adalah satu pilihan yang mungkin bagus.

Atau mungkin berhenti, and menjadi jurujual di Isetan, KLCC.

"Tapi, kau kena ingat mak kau. Duet yang die dah bagi. Banyak."

Entahlah. Aku hanyaa perlu Mel, and ibuku. and rumahku, untuk sekarang.

But, no matter what you never see me cry.

that bestie of mine.

2009-02-21T02:29:00.000+08:00

maaf mencuri tajuk, mell.

haha.

but, seriously, today was an awkward day.

dari melaka ke kl, in just 3 hours.
setibanya di kl, terus ke klcc.
and. .
terserempak rakan lama, and terus berjalan. hanya aku dan mel. haha.

amat seronok.

and just menghabiskan waktu bersama rakan baikku, yang kurindui.
malamnya, untuk pertama kali, ke TGI Friday'. Yeah. Sifat kampung.
Tapi, for the Very Best Meal, tiada apa dapat diberi sebagai balasan.

Iryani bt Akram, if only you know, what I know, and feel.
Ape ape, aku berterima kasih, dari hati. Kepadanya, keluarganya. . .

Biarlah hari hari mendatang menjadi segembira ini.
Insya Allah.

Fucked Up Life

2009-02-07T01:34:00.000+08:00

KL, Acap kembali lagi.

Hee. Aku merindui KL. The many times I've been here. Tapi, belakangan ini, aku semakin menjauh dari KL. Assignment. Meeting, (hampir setiap malam), and berhadapan dengan Pondan wannabe di bilik sendiri. Gosh.

Anyway, semester 3 memang susah. take my word for it. bukan kerna assignment saje. ditambah dengan drama. kes curi. discpline problem.

i just cant wait till the third sem is over. so, that i'll have soo much fun.

they say, the grass is always greener on the other side. Apparently, i dont know which sides does the green exists. .

gowd. i just hope everything will turn out for the better. Hopefully.

:(

.New Semester, New Dramas.

2009-01-26T11:31:00.000+08:00

.Azzah & I.

After such a long and extended holiday, the new semester finally began. Bringing with it, sigh, lots of new and old dramas, new and old friends and such. For starter, I was boarding this bus to UiTM at 9pm, on 4th of January, and there’s this Part One student, who actually knew me through the MMS week. And then of course, there are always my beloved room mates. Okay, truthfully, I was not suppose to be in the room, but then, problems occurs and like always, people very much like to talk in the back rather than confront it. Hint, hint.

And then, there’s this Tengku something who’s Grandpa has just died. The Yang Dipertua Negeri Sembilan, something. Apparently, he’s in our room now. And the best part is, he likes, OBSESS to one of the few people who constantly went into our room. And he told us. And expect us not to feel anything, and keep it a secret. Duh.

New semester, the classes, well, as they always said, “Getting Tougher by the Moment”. We have to shoot pictures using cameras, do Graphic, wear formal on Friday, and dealing with Ustaz as the English teacher. The lecturers, well, for sure is very different from last semesters’. To top it all, I signed myself us for Seni Tari, which sadly, only has 5 people in it. Four of which I am not-so-close to. Gosh, and to think that I still have four months.

And then of course, the old feud, left unsettled. Well, not a feud, more to, misunderstanding, it seems.

As for old flames, who would have thought, it rises back. Of course, yeah, I AM SO HAPPY with my significant others now. But then, what do you do if you owe this someone a position, and your assignments. Someone who really likes you… or, maybe just using you. What would you do?

It is not my intention to hurt anyone. In fact, I would very much love to please everybody. But then, The More Friend You Have, The More Enemy You’ll Get, or something. It is just something you have to deal with.

I just wish, with the New Semester and the New Year, it will not only bring with it New Dramas, but also Lots of Success, Happiness and, Great Stuffs. And may my relation does not affect my studies. :)

p/s - this one is written last two weeks. Since then, well, dramas mounting. sigh.

.Sorotan '08.

2009-01-04T07:14:00.000+08:00

.before the cut.

.after the drastic decision.

2008 is already over, three days ago. Lots has happened since last year. Of course, what's life without dramas? Something to dish on, served hot in a platter of cruelty. Now, who wouldn't want that? Huu.

Anyway, just to keep the memories alive, I've long since decided to go down the memory lane, at least '08 lane. So, here's what been happening to me all through last year.

JANUARY 08

* My first month at UiTM. Gosh, it was tough. With the induction and such. I wouldn't be ashamed to admit that I've been crying in bed more than one times.
* I went back the very first week of January. I missed my dear friends.
* Despite all that, I know that it surely had taught me to be independent.
* Discover new friends. The folks of Dmc1a.

FEBRUARY 08

* Saw the very first time I went into Club. I wouldn't want it, at first, but Fikri was all, "Jomlah, Jomlah...", and well, yeah, it's not all that bad.
* The Valentine Day, well, apparently, someone I barely knew wish me that. It was sweet, at least while it lasted. Sigh.
* Mass Comm is lots of fun. You get to meet new people, get new insight and such.

MARCH 08

* Of course, the Higlight for this month will be that I met up with Irwansyah and Acha Septriasa. Whooo~!! Sadly, they were no longer an item. But they did look cute together, though. The best thing is I was out chasing them with Mel, my bestiest.
* FesComm went great. I was having fun. Doing an embarrassing Catwalk and being a Dress Up Mascot? Haha. That's also fun.
* The Assignment was overwhelming. Seriously. But that's part of being student.
* Oh. It's the very first time I met Rio.

APRIL 08

* Happy 19th Birthday to me.
* Exam is just round the corner, and I can't seem to stop fooling around. In fact, I went back to KL and well, things happened.
* My cousin went off to U.K. As for me, Malaysia seems pretty nice.
* Spent lots of time with Fikri and Mel. Study weeks and all. Gosh. I love them~!!
* And then, there was Final.

MAY 08

* Early May, still in exam "gloomy" mood.
* But, I still managed to stroll around Uptown, get myself a sweater, and meet Kobain Agrabain, for the first time too.
* The attempt to get a car license, which eventually, did not turn out great and brought me to Rawang, Fikri's house instead.
* Being a Bitch, twice.

JUNE 08

* Still not giving up, I strive on the License thing. Gosh. For a weak person, it was hard.
* Semester break. After a while, I started to get Real Bored. Luckily there was Fikri.
* Being a bitch, thrice and ended up getting a Loved one. Thanks Syah.

JULY 08

* Senior already. Huu.
* Back to being single. I was strong, and I got over it quick.
* Meet new friend, Fyan, from Mass Comm.
* Messed lots of things up. What can i say? I am clumsy, way clumsy.
* Moved to new rooms, with all my Anak2.
* Being a Bitch.
* Involved in one's relation. Sorry everyone, didn't mean that to happen.

AUGUST 08

* Presenting, the New line of Komed. And I'm in the line. Gosh. There must be lots of talking done. "Acap wannnabe", "the bitch", and all... But then, I was chosen, there must be a reason for that.
* Second sem, the stakes are higher.
* Add to that, all the while being watched by an eagle eye.
* And then, there was FesKem.

SEPTEMBER 08

* Happy Fasting Month. The best thing about it, I passed my car license, finally, on the third day of Fasting.
* Drama keeps going on.
* Syerie and Azzah, all the while provided lots of supports, and all the others.
* Finally, a break before Raya. Topman, Big Kudos thanks to Fikri.

OCTOBER 08

* Minal 'Aidil Wal Faizin. Happy Hari Raya.
* The last Public Speaking, which i didnt do as well as the Geisha thing.
* Assignments all around. All works now. Oh. Add to that the "Jamuan Hari Raya" and Dean List ceremony. Been real busy.
* Manap, thanks for the ride. My first baby step to Annas.
* Final, already, for the second time. I know for sure I am Doomed.

NOVEMBER 08

* Still in Exam mood.
* Went to Reptile Park. I know, but its cool.
* My first time went Overnight-ing. Thanks Luls for the great night.
* Finally, the exam's over. And so are all the plans made.
* The holiday was bittersweet.
* On the relation side, I was deciding between Zeus and Syannas.
* Rawang times for me, second time around.

DECEMBER 08

* Last month of 08.
* The best thing holiday is, you'll be free and the chances of meeting almost everyone is Big. I met up with Amerul, Faiz and Padin, and Chef Wan. Huu.
* Mel's party went great. Too bad I can't go to Fikri's.
* First time I met up with Syannas. And the memoirs? I'm keeping it for myself.
* After two days, it become official, with a Ring involved.
* And then, there was being PM thing. The whole event went, as always bittersweet. Rumah dah Siap, tapi tukul masih berbunyi, something.
* And then, there was New Year 08. Which I spent with long time buddies, Shariman, watching Fireworks somewhre around Bukit Setiawangsa.
* Resolution? Got none. But, I'm botak now. I guess that's a start.

Well, in a gist, that's what been happening. Yeah. Its always easier when you listed it down, rather than experiencing it ya self. Whatever its is, Goodbye 2008, Hello 2009. :)

.Troubles.

2008-12-31T12:40:00.000+08:00

KL, here I am again. Just for the New Year. Just for Annas. Well, not exactly. I came back, since I really need to enjoy the last weeks of Holiday, although, yeah, the Holiday's now over, and its back to Class, Assignment and all.

Being a PM, it seriously a Fucking Damn Tired job. But then, the memories are Sweet, way Sweet. Tapi, penat dye, x hengat. Huhu.

These last few days, I was real busy. No time for people. Sleep was pretty much limited. I just hope that the someone would understand. Out of all people.

If we are already in Love with Someone, would it be a Big Mistake if we were having sex with others?

Had the question being asked for me last year, I would say, "Hell, its just a sex. Not like it mean anything.". But then, a year has passed since. I met lots types of people. Involved in many kind of relations. Achieved lots of things. Things I would never even have imagined.

And thru the times, I learned that to be faithful is to stick with that person. But then, what if we are TOO sticking with them? Wouldn't it cause a problems?

And, a relations that being rushed, would it "cepatkan lagy proses pengClashan?", or so the said.

I dont know.

"It so Much Better to be Single", I have said once. I guess till now, I still believe that that's true. . .

And maybe, I wasn't to born to have any relation. Ever.

.Helping Hands.

2008-12-24T11:56:00.000+08:00

Finally, after a while of not seeing any computer, (I am getting real pissed by the moment), well, finally here I am. In one of UiTM Malacca's computer.

And yeah, I can't really believed that I am doing all this thing. Becoming PM, and such. I thought of spending the last days at home, idling around. But then, well, I am doing this for the sake of my Mom. It turn out to be quite fun. Everbody's seem chilled and all.

Well, perkara paling dibenci adalah bangon bangon awal and tidoe lambat.
There's one time, the Speaker actually said that, he saw I was sleeping. God. Malu.

Still, there are, few things that really will make up for all the times spent here. I've decided to went back to KL. After all, I haven't gone to Dad's grave in a while. And a proper a Good-bye haven't been said. And yeah, I would really love to meet Annas, again.

Last Friday was a total drama. Drama in the Dancefloor sangat. PDA all over. And yea, I meet new friends.

Gosh, Falling In Love, all over again.

Just hope that, this time, it would be for real.

Another 7 days. Gowd. Wish me best Of luck. :)

.Dilemma.

2008-12-21T00:27:00.001+08:00

The holiday is about to come to an end. Gosh. I hate it. The feeling you get when a holiday is about to be over. But, heck, I am not the only one.

Anyway, last two days, the HEP of UiTM Malacca called me. Regarding the “Pembantu Mahasiswa” post that I applied earlier. It was a bit of a really late last minutes notice, and frankly, I haven’t had enough of spending the days at home.

Of course, staying at house and idling around driving me nuts. But, it’s much fun, compared to the times at Malacca. No home works. No backstabbers. Less drama, (OK, that would be a lie, Malacca or KL the drama is just the same). But then, I don’t know, I planned to savour this last week with my friend.

I have juggling through the pros and cons. At least, some of it. And asked around people’s opinion about it. in return, I get some mixed answers, definitely not helping.

Staying Home at Lovely KL … or Become a Newbies Facilitator???

These are the Good Sides, of being a Facilitator, at least what I can list.

1. I can relive the moment when I was a freshies. (After all, it’s the December intake, just like when I got in).
2. There is some money being offered. (Not much, but then, some cash would be good).
3. I am quite afraid, had I turned down this opportunity, will it ever come again?
4. Of course, I’ll be doing some good deeds.
5. I have nothing better to do at my house anyway.

But then,

There are Appeals of Staying Home.

1. I get to spend another splendid, out-of-college week at my home-y house, of course. Nothing like it.
2. Outing with my dear friends, here.
3. Truthfully, I don’t really expect that I would get the offer, anyway.

All these, and add to it the fact that I don’t know much people there. What if, I turned to be out there, alone? Hmm. This thing really IS confusing. Oh, and quoting what the HEP said, “Pastikan anda ada di sana pada 21 Disember, pukul 2 petang. Bas akan bawa anda ke hotel di Tanjung Bidara.”

It will be this Sunday. Gosh. And I haven’t really decided. I’m not all THAT conscious about getting back. But, uhmm, I don’t know.

I suppose, after thinking, I do have Plan B. Which is, I joined the program for a week, and as soon as its Friday, I’ll board the bus home. And will be coming on 4th Jan. But then, that include money, of which I don’t really have. But staying there? Man!

Gosh. . .

I just, I don’t know what to do. I wish I didn’t pick up that damn phone.

p/s - as to when im posting this, I have already decided, due to mom's suggestion, that i'd be goin to Malacca tomorrow.

.Dilemma.

2008-12-21T00:27:00.000+08:00

Betacorp Reunion

2008-12-17T00:07:00.000+08:00

. Air Assam McD's made my RAZ IDA NADIRA & I.

After not seeing my ex classmates, 4 BESTARI & 5 BESTARI (2005/2006) for a while now, I decided to went to the latest reunion, held on 14th December.
At first, I told myself that I wasn’t going. I don’t want to come, not unless, I had prove myself to be somebody. That I had my own transport and all. But, because of Ain, I came.

There was this Family Day at my mom’s workplace. I was feeling real guilt, since I decided not to go there. But then, I promised myself that I definitely go the next time it was held.

Anyway, the reunion went, well, quite boring at first. 10 am, at McD? Should’ve known better. But later, people stated to show up. And, Hazman came. I have been missing him since. And Raz, and Tika, and Afzan, and Fazilah, and Ain, and Dyla, and Fadhilah… well, lets just listed it.

The Lovely Girls of Betacorp

1. Afzan
2. Raz
3. Dyla
4. Fadhilah
5. Ayu
6. Tika
7. Ain
8. Fazilah

The Smoking Hot Guys of Betacorp

1. Ebal
2. Pa’an
3. Pi’ie
4. Sharir
5. Din
6. Pa’an Nizam
7. Fariq
8. Syafiq Izwan
9. Hazman
10. Acap, of course

Although not everybody comes, (ain’t all the reunion will see several people not coming in it?), the party went fine. We were talking, and catching up on the good old times. Gosh. I miss it, and I realized, I miss them. I don’t need to be someone else, because they knew me, as me. And forever will. Regardless the red hair and all…

The only boring thing is, well, we only spent the days at the McDonald. It was raining, so we count made our way to anywhere, pon.

They always say that pictures speak a thousand words. Well, let these speaks for themselves.

Oh, again, to all Betacorpian, I Love You Guys. We’ll just have to do this again any other time. And Thanks Bunch Ebal for the ride.

.Mel’s Birthday Bash.

2008-12-16T23:51:00.000+08:00

.The Fabulous Party People.

.Acap & Fabulous Ari.

.Acap & Fabulous Alice.

.Mels with the Fabulous Gifts.

It took me a while to write this. Well, busy, at home. Haha.

Anyway, as I said, it is the BEST BDAY PARTY I ever had. Terbaek, The Greatest. Haha. I don’t know if anyone notices, but Kobby Fierce and I do contribute, at least part of it. It all start well, accidentally I saw Kobby onlining. And I already had this idea, of doing something at Mel’s party. So, we were brainstorming, and comes,

1. Accessories for the party
2. Gifts for Mel
3. Cakes

So, secretly, we met up a day before the party. Oh, the ite before, I was fighting my butt, and life, to ‘rempit’ and find the accessories. The ‘Feeewwitt’ thing, Alphabest and all. The next day, well, I met Kobby, and we bought the ‘Pop’ thing. (It would have been good if we could played it in the Karaoke room, but, sadly, we cant). Anyway, we went to Pavilion, and searched for the cake.

Zen seems nice, but then, it was RM 52. So, we made our way to Secret Recipe. What do you know? Its more expensive there. Back to Zen. Then, while we were finding gifts (more like Kobby finding the gift), we surprisingly, saw Chef Wan. I was way excited.

Anyway, as the night passed, it was 12 o clock. And I was at Mel’s. The way I planned it all the times before. And I sang ‘Happy BIRTHDAY TO You”, together with Fikri. Sigh. That’s the first drama. Apparently, he wanted to join in the fun, but Bad seems not too excited by it. I was torn apart, yet again. . .

The next day, after Friday prayer, I made my way to Mel’s. And presenting, Malaysia’s Next Top Mak Andam, Acap. Haha. We were dressing up, and I was working on my gift, at his house, using his own printer. Pathetic. And dramas of the day comes. Alice was late, and as we made our way, the streets were packed! But we made our way through.

And the room, it was huge. That’s when Kobby break it. That we had met te day before, and that we have few decorations to made. And slowly, here comes the guests. Ady, Chin and Ari were the first one to come.

That, followed by Azahar (yeay!). And then, came Alice, Putri and Shila. These girls were way cool. The party started, but frankly, I have been digging up the foods way before the party was officially started. Cant help it, since it was BUFET Bash a.k.a Eat ALL You Can Bash.

The rest, as they said, is history. We camwhore-ing, karaoke-ing, bitchy-ing, and having Fun. Yeah. It was fun. The foods was WAY Delicious. There was all sorts of cakes. Spaghettis. Rice. Chickens. Lobsters. Oysters. (Hint for Ari…Haha). And lots more. And here comes the cakes. And, Opening Presents Session. I’m quite glad, knowing I was part of this. The karaoke went to 11 o clock.

Oh, Ady’s voice really is tip top. As someone as said “Meleleh dah pon”.

Then, come the after party. Where the Real drama begun. Apparently, we were waiting for Danang who had a prom. And there were only two cars since Putri has left. So, while waiting, I saw the guy from Seremban, that I did mention in one of my blogs. And Fikri was pushing me. I thought of going to after party, (which happened to be at the club) with the crazy kids. But well, as always I accompanied Fikri. It wasn’t all bad. I saw Shah, which I had mention in blogs, too.

I was dancing like crazy. After so many months not being there, well, there I was. I met Fikri’s friends. Yoko, Shafiq, Ryan… And Mel left me. We get out from the club at three, and made our way to NZ. Fikri was, again, being Fikri, and I was, at Mel’s house, being Acap. It was a fucking tired day. But, definitely ONE OF THE BEST DAYS EVER.

P/s – at NZ, Mel, Kobby and Azahar all said the same things, that I should move over Annas. But I don’t know. The feeling was there. Sigh.

.Mel’s Birthday Bash.

2008-12-16T14:01:00.000+08:00

It took me a while to write this. Well, busy, at home. Haha.

Anyway, as I said, it is the BEST BDAY PARTY I ever had. Terbaek, The Greatest. Haha. I don’t know if anyone notices, but Kobby Fierce and I do contribute, at least part of it. It all start well, accidentally I saw Kobby onlining. And I already had this idea, of doing something at Mel’s party. So, we were brainstorming, and comes,

1. Accessories for the party
2. Gifts for Mel
3. Cakes

So, secretly, we met up a day before the party. Oh, the ite before, I was fighting my butt, and life, to ‘rempit’ and find the accessories. The ‘Feeewwitt’ thing, Alphabest and all. The next day, well, I met Kobby, and we bought the ‘Pop’ thing. (It would have been good if we could played it in the Karaoke room, but, sadly, we cant). Anyway, we went to Pavilion, and searched for the cake.

Zen seems nice, but then, it was RM 52. So, we made our way to Secret Recipe. What do you know? Its more expensive there. Back to Zen. Then, while we were finding gifts (more like Kobby finding the gift), we surprisingly, saw Chef Wan. I was way excited.

Anyway, as the night passed, it was 12 o clock. And I was at Mel’s. The way I planned it all the times before. And I sang ‘Happy BIRTHDAY TO You”, together with Fikri. Sigh. That’s the first drama. Apparently, he wanted to join in the fun, but Bad seems not too excited by it. I was torn apart, yet again. . .

The next day, after Friday prayer, I made my way to Mel’s. And presenting, Malaysia’s Next Top Mak Andam, Acap. Haha. We were dressing up, and I was working on my gift, at his house, using his own printer. Pathetic. And dramas of the day comes. Alice was late, and as we made our way, the streets were packed! But we made our way through.

And the room, it was huge. That’s when Kobby break it. That we had met te day before, and that we have few decorations to made. And slowly, here comes the guests. Ady, Chin and Ari were the first one to come.

That, followed by Azahar (yeay!). And then, came Alice, Putri and Shila. These girls were way cool. The party started, but frankly, I have been digging up the foods way before the party was officially started. Cant help it, since it was BUFET Bash a.k.a Eat ALL You Can Bash.

The rest, as they said, is history. We camwhore-ing, karaoke-ing, bitchy-ing, and having Fun. Yeah. It was fun. The foods was WAY Delicious. There was all sorts of cakes. Spaghettis. Rice. Chickens. Lobsters. Oysters. (Hint for Ari…Haha). And lots more. And here comes the cakes. And, Opening Presents Session. I’m quite glad, knowing I was part of this. The karaoke went to 11 o clock.

Oh, Ady’s voice really is tip top. As someone as said “Meleleh dah pon”.

Then, come the after party. Where the Real drama begun. Apparently, we were waiting for Danang who had a prom. And there were only two cars since Putri has left. So, while waiting, I saw the guy from Seremban, that I did mention in one of my blogs. And Fikri was pushing me. I thought of going to after party, (which happened to be at the club) with the crazy kids. But well, as always I accompanied Fikri. It wasn’t all bad. I saw Shah, which I had mention in blogs, too.

I was dancing like crazy. After so many months not being there, well, there I was. I met Fikri’s friends. Yoko, Shafiq, Ryan… And Mel left me. We get out from the club at three, and made our way to NZ. Fikri was, again, being Fikri, and I was, at Mel’s house, being Acap. It was a fucking tired day. But, definitely ONE OF THE BEST DAYS EVER.

P/s – at NZ, Mel, Kobby and Azahar all said the same things, that I should move over Annas. But I don’t know. The feeling was there. Sigh.

.Happy Birthday Mels.

2008-12-14T02:50:00.000+08:00

Well, what can i say, the headlines pretty much says it all.

My VERY, VERY, VERY BEST friend just turned 19 two days ago.

The best thing is, I was with him in the 11th December night, with Makhayam. and there we were, singing Happy Birthday to You, for him.

what went on the actual day, well, so Much More interesting.

but, since I am SOO Fucking Tired to tell, lets keep it to the next day.

again, to my VERY, VERY, VERY, VERY, VERY BEST BUDDY, happy 19th Birthday. May You Have All That You Asked For. And May Years Ahead Brings LOTS Of happiness to you.

Oh,and..

Since Badrul Muzammil is going to grade pretty soon, let us all wish him a Happy Graduation too. May He would be passing the Exams ( each and evry single one of them), with a flying, hell, SOARING Colour.

:)

the L.O.V.E part II

2008-12-14T02:34:00.000+08:00

After much postponed dates, eventually, I met up with Zeus a.k.a Eby Khuzaer. Hurm, I was damn nervous, I thought will stop beating. But, upon meeting him, the nervousness subsided, a bit. My first impression, when I saw him was, well, he’s bit short than me.

But he’s quite good looking. Oh, and I noticed, the accent. He’s Malay alright, but something not quite right. And he kept talking in English, in his slow voice. Gosh. But, he seemed charming that way. just as the dates heat up, well, we went over to see his aunt. Very nice lady. Oh. And on-the-go one.

We only went to KLCC Park. And as it was raining, we went to dine at the road leading to Pavi. It was sweet. We even hold hand while eating sandwiches. And all the while, he was looking and admiring my eyes.

“You have very beautiful eyes. Those who cant see it because they are blind”.

I was like, OK. But, later the date turned well, to a horny site. We were making out at the Park. I don’t want it to, since it is our first date, (will there be others, well, lets see…), but don’t want to disappoint him.

As the date came to an end, I can tell we both want it not to. He keeps asking if he could crash in my house. I was like, no. and he invited me to his instead. as much as I wanted to, well, I promised my mom to be back home. And frankly, it’s our first date.

“NO SEX IN FIRST DATE”, they always said.

I don’t know if I am making the right choice. What about Anas? Hurm. God. It SOO much better to be single. Single AND Loving it.

.Minal 'Aidil Wal Fai'zin. part II

2008-12-09T01:31:00.000+08:00

Its Raya, again.

This time around, its Aidiladha.

The time where we Sacrifice, not just for the COWS,GOATS... but also for everything.

Let Us All Be Blessed By Him.

Sacrifice for a Better Life, so that we can Be a Better Person.

Happy Aidiladha 1429 Hijrah.

:P

Rawang’s Experience

2008-12-08T00:19:00.000+08:00

Referring to the headlines, well, I just recently spent some quality times, ( a week, to be frank), at Rawang, one of my best Friend’s, Fikri the Makhayam house. Just like I did, on last semester break. It was, well, bittersweet. It all started on 27 November. Fikri texted, and sad that he was coming. So there I was, waiting for him. While Mel has impatiently for me, as he has another plan to Mali’s.

It wasn’t till 12 something that Fikri came. It was raining. and there was Izzaty, the ‘girl that always trying to pretend to be guy, but cant since she doesn’t has any penis’, and this Pengkid. At that point, I know I am not going to like this. Well, Fikri drive us to Shah’s, another Pengkid like Izzaty, but a much nicer one. Now, it is not that I don’t like Pengkid. Hell, I even thought they as wonderful, and cute some times. But I knew Izzaty, and Shah. Long way back.

Anyway, that’s all that we done. And Fikri sent me home, with this crazy idea of him. ‘Jomlah pegi Rawang, dah lame x jumpe.’ And I got stuck, as I always did. And, next thing I knew, I was already fast asleep, and missing Subuh prayer, at his home in Ampang. The next day, I missed Friday’s prayer. No thanks to his mom.

And, what do you know? Fikri’s auntie came that Friday to Rawang, asking him to sleep at their home that Friday night. What can I do? I just had to follow. Though I didn’t really want to… the next day, we went to Times Square. To ‘support Ejat in OIAM audtion’, so to cover. Syikin wanted to see her new boy, and Fikri wanted to see his friends. And that lefts me, ‘left out’, again.

And straight from Times Square, Fikri’s auntie picked us up, straight to Rawang. Thought that we were coming back there. And I left my phone charger. Oh, wait a minute. How can I left it, if the auntie said herself, ‘Tak payahla bawak barang sume’. So, up till now, my chargers are still in Saujana Impian, cause of Fikri. Shit.

There always are silver lining beneath the dark clouds. In this case, well, I manage to buy a RM10 cardigan/sweatshirt and a belt (sadly, its ruin now). And her auntie took us to this cool Restaurant, with a ship in the middle of it. And a Western cuisine offered.

Only the next day, did Fikri started to bake cookies, the real reason I came to his home. And, as for Fikri’s promise to be back by Selasa, well, it’s a lie, as always. It is Khamis instead. Sigh. Spending the days at Rawang, well, it’s not all that good. Yes, I haven’t seen him in a long time. But I don’t know. Things just have not been the way it used to. Fikri got new friends. Mel, too. It’s good for them, since I was not here. But, I can not help but feeling a bit of jealousy. But people change, so do us, I guess.

Monday, it was rather sad, since we, (Fikri’s dad and I), came to Keramat, even drive through my flat. But just goes straight. I wondered how my brother was doing in his Accounting paper.

Anyway, things didn’t get any better. You know how after you spent too many times with someone, you get tired of them? Well, that’s exactly what happened to me, to us. And the fact that his parents keep to do this and that, well, it was overwhelming. And I was beginning to miss Chiko, my lovely laptop. I left him while he can’t even be turned on. He is OK now, though.

Finally, the visit comes to an end. Khamis, his parents send both of us, with dramas, of course. Fikri wanted to accompany me to Low Yat, but I just didn’t feel like having company. And he was just freaking jealous since Mel called. He has been that way, the whole week. I just, I don’t know. Will all people please stop being that way? I had friends, and I’m balancing it. Getting all jealous isn’t going to make it any better.

It was raining, Khamis. But, I was running, from KLCC, all the way to Low Yat. I was soaked. But, Chiko needed to be heal, so to speak.

In the night, Mel called. He just comes back from Mid Valley, with Kobby. And I accompany him, sending Kobby back to Wangsa Maju. Gosh. I missed him. Its been a week since that crazy days. And what do I know? I missed lots of things. And he went to Club, last Friday. As if that wasn’t enough, the next day was his parents’s Wedding Anniversary. It was sweet. And the cake’s tiramisu. And I was there. Such nuisance.

As bad as it sounds, there are great things in the whole week. Saturday, Awal Ashaari was taking escalator, just beside us. And I let it slips. Just like that. Knowing Fikri, he was like, ‘Kenapa nak ambil gambar dengan die? Bla, bla…’ Its artist, bitch! And the whole week, I was texting bot of Annas and Eby. I like them both. Both of whom I haven’t see. Annas seems interested in me, much. I don’t know.

Next semester break, I don’t know if I’m coming to Rawang still, or not. Let’s just wait and see now, shall we?

Fun and Enjoyment

2008-12-07T23:40:00.000+08:00

Last week, and this week, has seen me taken a very well, relax mood. Been to some cool places. Spent times with new ‘Cool’ friends, and such.

Well, on my second weeks out of UiTM, at first, it was boring. And spending so MANY times at home, it finally get to me. Thought about working, but, well, after considering all of these, decided not to, instead…

1) I am SOO not in the mood for working.
2) It will only be for couple of weeks.
3) And, I guess, I just didn’t need the money, bad enough.

Thanks God, Mel comes to the rescue. Last weeks, (23 till 30 of November), I had my, what you can call, one of the best weeks ever. Wednesday, 26 November, however I must say, the very best day, and night, for that matter. I was rather bored. Suddenly Mel called and asked to accompany him for ‘lunch’. I was like, OK. Then, we’ll meet up with Kobby. And then there’s Danang. And then., there’s Rio. So there we were, at 3 0’clock, suddenly on our way to, on a VERY short notice, Mid Valley. Gosh.

But it was great. Although I did get that ‘left-out’ feeling nonetheless, it was fun. They made fun of me. But, best thing about it is, they sort of turn in into a joke. One that I can tolerate with. Hints for some people.

Introducing… star in the making, Siti Nurhalicap. Haha. The pictures wont be displayed, though. Then there was Azahar Abdullah. It felt good to see him, after one whole year. Not that we are really close. But, I don’t know. He is such a funny guy. Then, after much Walking, Camwhoring and Dissing (and of course, Scanning…Haha), we left Mid. Thought the crazy day is coming to an end. But, in a short while, I find myself packing things for a sleepover and heading over to Uptown. With Mel, and Kobby. It was raining, though. No thanks to these two kids who were singing, badly at Uptown.

And then, enter Ellis, and her friends. Mel’s T.A.R College mates. They were all COOL. Especially Ellis. Mel has talked about her several times. But, seeing her live, well, it just insane. She is loud, but seriously aa fun person to live with. Oh. And she even treat us to Shisha, right in Mali’s. My FIRST ever Shisha experience. And nothing I would like to change about it.

After a few, maybe more, act of sucking, the wors seems rather dizzy. And mom, I know I promised myself to be back for Subuh, but my head hurts, like it was going to explode.

We managed to come back to Mel’s, somehow alive, at 3 something in the morning. And as if that wasn’t enough, Kobby taught me how to dance. Now, put your Hands Up! Haha. He’s a great teacher.

But seriously, last Wednesday has been fun. I went to Mid Valley, Danau Kota, Mali’s. Big thanks go to Badrul, and Kobain.

.Relieved.

2008-11-22T16:07:00.000+08:00

It really is a relieved, since we have, FINALLY, finished up all the papers. I can safely say, now that one burden is over, (although during the exams, I managed to come late, to ALL the papers), its ime to party.

I still don’t know yet, what I will be doing this semester’s break. Maybe whoring, sleeping, and catching up all the good times I missed in KL. But then, the money is rather tight. Hurm, well, that’s for me to think, later…

Anyway, now that I’ve been here, for like, 3 days now, I must say, I had the greatest days. First, with my room mates. Here’s the thing, I always come out late during exam. During the last day, 18th, it was raining, and our bus is at 6 o’clock. And, I only finished paper at 5.15. I was running, and thank God we managed to arrive to bus station, right in time.

After spending a not-so-pleasant night at my friend’s, we made our way back to KL. At this point, I had really missed my KL friends. UiTM, well, it’s holiday, so I want to pretty much spend the day with old friends. Tension was running high at this moment, and this Malacca noks, pretend to know everything about KL. Like duh. I was the one who lives here. Although it was fun, I just cant wait to get home, though.

The next day, I spent it with Mel, my bestiest. I went to his home, hoping to get my lens. Then, the news come out, where Leona Lewis, Beyonce, Christina Aguilera, and Hilary Duff has released the Deluxe Edition of their albums. So, we went to Sg Wang, on a short notice. There, we met up with Kobain, who is now, well, Kobain Fierce. Haha. Put a Wig on It, anyone?

Then, we went to Old Town, in Taman Melati. Gosh, so close to my Auntie’s.
Next, I spent the night with Mel’s. It felt great, since, after 3 weeks not seeing each other, we met up, and our friendship still sit in a strong ground. And I was thinking, my UiTM friends would never do this to me. Well, they are the friends in need, not the friend indeed. And they say all the worst things, hoping us not to feel irritated. Whateves. Now that I’m in KL, its time to forget matters, and have fun.

The night continues as Fikri the Makhayam, who now have car license (sigh, finally), pick me up and we went strolling around. I was pretty much beat up, by then, but he is still ONE of my bestiest, so, I accompany him. And he introduces me to Jay and Shark. I was a bit jealous, since he had new friends. But, it’s good for him, since now that I am gone, he needs someone to spend the time with.

I only managed to sleep at 3 0 clock. Gosh. It was KL life for me, after 3 weeks haven’t set foot here. And, yes, I am DAMN FUCKING relieved to take a vacation from Alor Gajah.

.OverNight.

2008-11-11T20:52:00.000+08:00

Last Sunday was cool. Way cool. The first overnight of my life, and there's nothing i'd like to change about it. I'd be with two of my Bestiest, here in UiTM, Lulu, the Techtonic and Cool gal, and Uwais, one who would always look up for me. Every minutes of the night was real great, since the first step I made into Lulu's car, to the very step I took out of her car.

It was Syerie who called and asked me. Since we just finished with Human Comm, i think it'd be great for us. Gosh. Now this, could be called a REAL tension. Well, to start things off, we, (after the Ramadhan month), went to dine in Borahan Seafood @ Taman Perindustrian Zarina and ate the delicious Barbecue Sauce.

Next, we made our way to Jonker Walk. My first time being there, too. It was someting like Petaling Street. Malacca Version of it, at least. Lulu was searching for a Cheongsam, and my, she looks cute in it. But then, this 'Makcik' scold us, after trying, taking pictures and not buying it. Heheh. On the same street, we tasted this delicious and just to die for, ice jelly something. Lulu's treat, that is.

Next, we moved to Banda Hilir, Melaka. Now i know, that there are clubs here, for real. The Office really did got my attention, one where you have to dress formally, like you just get back from office. Quite cool. Plan to go with Azzah, some other time.

Lulu also took us to Jetty, both new, and old Jetty. While the old one (located in Kampung Melayu Portugis) is quite forgettable, the new one is Havoc. We karaoke-ing, sing our throats out, shaking our booty (hahah), and it was worth it. Para laila Bamba..

Next, we spent therest of the night in Pantai Puteri. Last semester, I was writing an article about it, and finally I got to see the beach right in front of my eyes. We were sort of waiting for the sunrise, sadly, it comes from the other part. By then, all of us has gotten really sleepy. We ate breakfast in Sungai Petai, and then time to go back.

The UiTM guard seemed suspicious. Hell, why would students opt for a breakfast? But then, still let us go. All in all, it was way better outing rather than the previous one. Well, let the pictures speak for itself.

.007:Quantum of So-Boring-Lace.

2008-11-07T17:11:00.000+08:00

it was in the middle of examination weeks.
and the tension, atmosphere finally gets to me. cant wait to get back to KL.

well, i wasn't in the mood for outing, either. but several people manage to get me in the car, walk a bit, dine in one of Mamak Stall, and finally settle in with a James Bond. Sigh. Looking at me, people wont expect me to watch that kind of genres. Dont get me wrong. I do know, and love, several action movies. Terminator Chronicles, Gone in 60 Days... just to name a few (since i only know that). Even James Bond, the past installations, do intrhues me. Die Another Day, James Moore versions, and such... is likeable.

but then, yesterday, as i watched it in Dataran Pahlawan's GSC, it just didnt get to me. okay, well, i started with my thoughts, 'the movie is gonna be boring', but then, i shook that thoughts away, and still watched. but its become so, how do you put it, BORING, that i slept, eventually.

the movie started off with James Bond being chased by some sort of CIA agents. the action was quite cool. the car chasing. Fighting to death. but then, comes the 'berbual' part. and what do I know, i slept. then, it became so boring that, there was this 'Biawak' in the desert, and i said, 'EH, buaya'. well, after that, the action continues.

James Bond, what do ya expect? Women all over. Sadly, the girl he fucked with, got killed, with lots of oil around her naked body. Pity.

Well, i do like the accent though. Since almost every part of the movie filmed in Spain sth, and I do really like Spain. Influenced by Maria Mercedes and Rosalinda, i guess.

All in all, I am sticking with my favourite genres of all. Horror. Bring back the good old Nightmare on Elm Street, Halloween, Carrie, Poltergeist... even I Know What You Did Last Summer.

.last few days.

2008-10-23T18:56:00.000+08:00

I'm quite glad, now. since we're already in our last week, here in UiTM Malacca. All the class has finished since this Tuesday. (as to when I write this thing, it's Azan Maghrib, and it's Thursday).

if it was to me, i have long ago pack my bag, and BYE2 Malacca. but then, well, we still have several matters. we have to change our KOKO, and submit assignments, (which, hatefully, due tomorrow). and, to top things off, we' MassComm in Malacca, are having tests, on weekend, for God's Sake. Well, it wouldnt be the first, but, hell~! Weekend. Last weekend of Ramadhan. People were like, having last minutes 'Raya Party' and all. And we have to sit for our Final Test. Writing and Public Speaking, that is.

this week, it had been crazy. People were like, all shout, all making faces. And, somewhere along the lines, I dont FUCKING know how i get myself involved.

Problems with classmates. And then, Assignments. And then, Room mates. Pegghs. and i could stay steady. and the fact that if have red hair. WTF??! So what? People are having blondes, perples whatever fucking colour.

there are good things, out of this, though. Mass Comm, we'll have a tea party. this Saturday. and just recently, i sit and talked with, get this, Liyana Jasmay~!!

and, i modelled for Dosh, my Room Mate, for his storyboard. huhuh~!
i could proudly say, 'wa caya sama lu, la dude!!', to myself.

:P

.masa.yang.lama.

2008-10-13T13:26:00.000+08:00

times, when we waited, it would be long, way long. kita kan selalu pkir macam tue. hurmx.

well, saye tak terkecuali. saye, menunggu..untuk ape? ntah. mati? maybe. someone to love? maybe, not.

wat it would felt like, dimandi, dikafan, disembahyangkan, and dikambus? alone. in the darkness. di dunie, kite hu~ha. hu~ha. di sane? it surely wont feel the same, will it? too much conciousness? hurmx. maybe it is my time to be conscious. i was always having fun. now that the final dah nak dekat, maybe its time to be serious.

for those whom i had loved, all the way from standard 6, it was fun knowing all of you. i cant say all the names, simply because i just wouldnt remember. tapi, all of these people, dorang jadikan saye, saye yang skarang. i may not be perfect. i may not be handsome, i may not be wise, i may not be rich, i may not wear expensive clothes, but, saye adalah saye.

(sebenarnya, saya pon xtahu wat am i trying to say here)

but i really am who i am. there's nothing i would like to change. saye amat gembira. and, walaupon sekarang saya ada problem besar, (malangnya, saya masih jadik orang ke3, yang padahal, saya x pon), and saya xpegi meeting komed last week (orang akan kate saya x wat kerja), and to top things off, saya betol2 windue BANGAT sama KL.

and for now, let people drool over me. i am sick and tired of being people's puppet. i am my own 'tuan'. now, its payback time.

call me a bitch, call me a whore. cal me whatever you would like for.

but i am me, a simple and real me, and i will always forever be.

.Three Weeks.

2008-10-06T19:43:00.000+08:00

oh~!

let it come early. i am just sick and tired of malacca already. since evrything that has happened, i just dont feel like coming back to UiTM anymore. well, i am still here, now, even though its really hard. and since the Raya Break, my mind still pretty much in KL. Im not saying that Malacca is bad, well, maybe just the people living in it, which, surprisingly, not even pure Malaccan.

well, i just hope for the best now. this weekend, we'll be having Final Test, for Public Speaking and Writing. gosh~! i really hope i could do well. my carrier mark, isnt all that great. i was REALLY hoping to get another DL.

hurm, for the upcoming three weeks, which i will be spending here, in UiTM, sigh, well, i just hope that it would turn out for the better. and all assignments, presentations and such will be done in a much better way.

.XOXO.

.Minal 'Aidil Wal Fa'izin.

2008-09-29T08:47:00.000+08:00

already in KL. for three days now. gosh. it was tiring.

accompanied Fikri to KLCC on Saturday. oh. for the first time, I'll be wearing Topman. and Crazee Causa. and Romp. and it was all as a gifts from Fikrie. huhuh. kudos to him.

and yeterday, went to Carrefour and bought things for Raya.

Oh. and i Drive. Finally, I already received my liceense, the exact one, which had my pix in it. was soo happy.

and, during the evening, i went to Bazar. and I met my old classmates, and schoolmates. Gosh. How things had changed. and I met Nik Hafeezi. it was last year, when we were both not doing anything. and it was also Ramadhan. and, well. Gosh. How many has changed, while in fact, it had only been a year.

anyway. in another two days. we'll be celebrating Aidilfitri. and Im going to spend it here. Hurm. i Dont Care. it doesnt even feel like Raya. anywhere. Kelantan. KL. Just the same. well, i have went to some ceramah, and such. and they said the 'Aidilfitri', literally translated will be 'Kembali Kepada Fitrah', or 'Back to Basic'.

the Basic refers to what we were, before Ramadhan. it would be such shame, if we go back to our once sinned life. and this one, i said it to myself. this year only, i have done things im not so very proud of. LOTS OF THINGS. I just hope i could change for the better. after all, isnt that what this Fasting Month all about. make yourself go better?

hopefully, i'll be able to make it real. oh. and ryte now, i just want to be, solo. like i did, last sem, and years before. single, happy and loving it.

any way. the holiday is packed with assignments. hopefully i would be able to complete it.

anyway. to all who read, have VERY HAPPY AIDILFITRI~!
and im SOO SORRY, for every wrongdoings, harsh words...
oh. and may dis year's Syawal be the most sweetest Syawal for all of us.

:p

...KETUPAT RENDANG SILA NIKMATI KWAN,
PENAT MEMASAK MALAM KE PAGI...LALALA...

too Late?

2008-09-24T14:07:00.001+08:00

and the dramas continue...

i still havent been able to solve it. the fact that the person gives a good response, really didnt help, at all. gosh. i can only imagine about this sort of thing, in previous years. and now, to be in the exact position which i dreaded so much...it was hard.

im very much still sad, since i didnt have a chance to give the person, all this letters which i wrote. i can possibly text, since the circumstances didnt allow us to. also, i've bought 'kad raya' specially for that person. but, then, last nyte, the person already made to move to the village. i guess we havent a 'jodoh' after all. if u could called this jodoh.

but then, there was somethinmg special between us. okay. usually, i will be the one who would ended up getting hurt, and theres the fact that i always come second. hell.

for all i know, the person didnt even care about me. but then, the person do care.

and, just how do you tell someone you loved, who love you back, but is torn between two people?

the person is not to be blamed. well then, should i? or, the circumstances?

i just wish, everything will turn out great.

and, that, i will end up with the person. someday. one day..

as for my gurl, i really do like, hell love her.

tp. im too afraid. of rejection. and that i would breaking her heart sometimes.

whatever it is, its Ramadhan, now.

oh, almost over. in next two days, i'll be boarding bus to KL. yeay~!!

SALAM AIDLIFITRI to ALL~!!

hopfully this year's Ramadhan bring lots of goodness...

dramas, Dramas.

2008-09-18T15:45:00.000+08:00

well. its been almost three weeks now, im being here at malacca.
gosh~! it is boring. i guess i really do loves kL.

hurm, for better or for worst, i am staying, though. well. i still havent settle things up with that person. gosh. at times, i just feel that i dont want to do this anymore. im sick, and tired. everytimes i did see the person, well... it just hurts me since i cant be with the person.

but, after much dramas, and again, being caught redhanded, well, i now realize that the person's not for me. or is it? i dont know...

even my studies been dropiing down. i had exams last two weeks, and my results ain't that good. i really do hope for another miracle to happen, and i'll get DL, again. even, our lecturer, Ms Farah, was furious at us since we havent excel. i promised myself, there and then, taht i would work hard. and, tried to forget the person.

oh. i really did miss KL. and my Mom. and Mel. and Fiq. i longed to live the life i once lived. everything was so simple. and i wont even think about all the troubles. Sigh.

but then, i would not experience the life at UiTM. the so called "UiTM di Hatiku". but then, there are good things. for instance, i am now officially the new secretary of KOMED. hahah. i cant even thought myself as being a clerk. but last nyte, it had been fun. we have the Photo Shoot. now i knoe, IT IS HARD TO BE A MODEL.

oh~!
i wanted to come back to KL and get my new brand car license!!
let next friday come out early...

dear, Diary

2008-08-28T16:41:00.000+08:00

Dear diary.

I have been here for only 4 days. And, I do not know. It is just that, things have been on a roller coaster. I, just, well, at first, I was glad to be here. As I would then get a chance to see him. The guy that I loved so much. Loved being the word.

But then, I don’t know. I guess, he only manages to say that on the holiday. We hardly ven saw each other. Except for last to nyte. Only to find him with, well, he’s beloved. Not that I should be mad, or anything. They should live their life, happily as they wanted it to be.

But I just couldn’t deny the feelings. What is up with him?? He told me, he loved me. And really mad since I didn’t reply the messages. But now that im here. He just keeps silents. People are against us. LOTS of people. Faiz. Fazrul. Dosh. His boy, of course. And, the only supporter I have, is Syerie. And Azzah.

I don’t know. Maybe I should not meddle with their relations. Well. Yeah. I have all the sms –ers. But I just, I had fallen head over heels at him.

But, well, I guess I just played in the wrong lane. As, well, I don’t know. I will never get him. And frankly. I don’t even care. Owh. Who am I kidding? I do care.

Either way, I am living my life as how I wanted It to be. Or, is it? i don't know.
well, its surely my life.. and i decide it.

things happened for a reason, don't they?

2008-08-22T02:20:00.000+08:00

whoa.

its been a long time. since i last write. particularly since i've been so fucking busy at uitm, that not much time could be spent on writing blogs. that, plus the fact that I'm so damn lazy.

anyway, as always, my life never shy away from troubles. be it a big one, or small, tiny bit of it. at times, it get so hard that i almost like giving up all of this, returned to KL, and lives life as it was. at least, it wont be that hard. and at least, my emotions arent going to hurt.

oh. and before i said anything, Daus, 2a, well, u may said that mine is rather a typical blogs, that write about his lovers, his pathetic life, and all those dumb things, but well, it is mine. so, its my right, just to write anything i want to. anyway, not that I'm being mad or anything. after all, we live for a comment to improve us up, don't we?

oh. after a month there, i had been through a lot. first, there was this nomination for the MT thing. i was so excited, at first. so, after my class has voted me in, i went to the screening. later, things happened, and i seriously just want to quit. but, i never gave up.

add to that, my roomie, is a junkie. and i had been messing things up. such as damaging this person's buckle. lost the other person pen drive. lost our CTU notes, which, its later turn out, couldn't be more perfect than we could hope for. great job. and this goes for Daus, Kerel, and, sure, u too, Hamzah.

on top of it all, i suddenly discovered that i was in the middle of one's relation, again. this time around, the person, of whom i liked, turn out to like me, also.
of course, i could just snake my way and made that someone chooses me, instead. but i don't want to. and now, i'm seriously stuck.

just to spice things up, my pen drive also got lost, by the time i came to KL. gosh. Misfortune All Over. n i failed my driving test. yesterday. gosh. i was SOO Fucking Damn Close to get a license.

anyhow, there are some good sides, out of all of this. the AGM, held on 10th August went great. i spent time with YANIE, most of the times. and, it was awkward. although nothing really changes after that. (referring to the post).

and, with my children, (in my room), i could never felt happier. at least, while i was at Melaka. we always have fun. and i SERIOUSLY DONT FUCKING CARE about others anymore. i'd done that for the whole First sem, well, not anymore.

and of course, discovering people. I LOVE MEETING BUNCHES OF PEOPLE. people of colors, someone once said. and whats more. the feeling of being adored. haha. not that too many of them.

anyway. now that the mid sem's break are coming to the end, we'll have once again to live our cruel life, there at Melaka. maybe i put it too harsh a word, but, thats exactly what i felt. and im writing it through my window.

Dramas, Still.

2008-07-18T14:53:00.000+08:00

2nd week at uitm.

well, after having such a great fun last weekend, sadly, i've git to go back to malacca. well, i am a student, so, it was like a job to go here and study.

last week has been fun, though.

Stuffs Can Change in a Week.

2008-07-13T00:48:00.000+08:00

Apparently, it is true.

I spent days at Malacca. Only days. And it seemed as though it had been 5 long years. I just, well, I had thought about not going back to Malacca. It was tiring, a long and and exhausting first semester, and I don’t know if I could bear with it anymore.

Well, things had not been as rough as I thought it would be, that fact is true. But then, it had only been a week. Even classes are like, blah. It was good though, the fact that I got to meet all the classmates. GOSH~! Had it really been last semester. It was like, I had known them for years.

Owh, and the love that I was bragging about? Let’s just say, that’s over. Huhu. At first, it was hard, real hard, and way hard. Bona fide hard. I was really, I don’t know. Intense. I was sad, devastated, miserable even… what else? U names it. but then, I still had friends, good friends along the way. They are the one who had helped me. And, I don’t know. I always know that this thing would happen, sooner or later. I guess, I just wish that it would happen much, much later.

Well, anyhow, it’s only for one day. The next day, I woke up, and already feeling good about myself. At least, I could once again said, that I am single. Huhu. I always love that title. It meant free. It means, you’re doing your own thing. It means independent. Plus, I had my whole life, and sadly, my whole diploma, right in front of me. And I have Yanie, and Fiqa. The classmates that I adores much. They are the reason that I stayed. One of the reason, at least. Oh, and of course, Azzah.

For better of for worst, I am now at KL. Yeay~! (It had not even been a week, since I went to Malacca. Hehe).

7/12/2008 1:58:36 PM

.the Love.

2008-07-04T02:27:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, I met off with my lover, for the second time. Still, I felt nervous, shivers, and such overwhelming feeling, all over. I don’t know. It’s just like, our first time, only its not. The meeting, well, it was…lukewarm. We had only met one time, and we already started a relationship.

You see, us is rather complicated. I knew him, more that I thought I did. Well, that’s the gist of it. It turn out, we’re in t same class, when we were in Standard 3, back at our old school, SKDTHO. And then he moved. And then we met, in the club. Somewhere around March this year. GOSH~!! And to think that we already whoring, dancing explicitly there, god, can’t even imagine.

“LOVE IN THIS CLUB”

Then, last week, I went to this house where, well, something’s happen.

And I met him there. After that, he said that he liked me. Really liked me. Even though I was just being myself. So, I was like, okay, we’re like moving too fast here. I mean, after that one meeting, he asked us to be, an item. I was, you know, after such hard years, I was like, heartbroken and all. But, he treated me so well. He always called me. And I never did. Haha.

Then, suddenly, we’re already in a relation. Okay. Ain’t it fast? Anyway, yesterday we met up. I was really uncertain, confused, ashamed, anxious, afraid, ohh... you name it.

Then I saw him, and, I don’t know. I just knew. It’s him. No one else. My love. So, we went strolling around, across the park. We even made out, lightly, of course. Gosh. I long for his lips to touch mine. I just ignored those people who were looking at us.

“I don’t care what they say, I’m in love with you~!”

Then, we went to McD. He insisted on paying for me. But I insisted not to. I’ve my own money. Plus, its not his money that I’m after. Next, we went to watch movies. The Nanny Diaries. Okay, for those who planned on watching it, please cancel your plan. I’m not saying it’s terrible, it’s just, if you’re looking for comedies, go with something else.

As soon as the movie ended, he said that he had to make his move. I was like, “but it’s still early…” unfortunately, he had to pick up his mom. Oh yea. Didn’t I say he lived at Shah Alam? I tagged along and sent him to KL Sentral. And I was like, “this guy got me going crazy. I even followed him to KL SENTRAL, while, at the same time, I could have gone home.

He gave me a peck on my lips. And I long for more. But well, it’s public. Huhuhu. Well, that was the all lovey, all romantic part of it. Here’s the hard part.

* The Distance

* Lack of Sparks

* I may not live up to his expectation.

Even my friends say, long distance relations rarely work. I knew that. LOL. I even had an experience in it. But, it’s all come to trust, right?

But then, how can I trust him, when I cant even trust myself? I’m afraid someone’s going to end up getting hurt, and I’m afraid it would be me.

Well, just for the record, it had been a week now, and we’re still together? Hence, it would be okay, will it?

.im so very happy.

2008-06-29T23:06:00.000+08:00

yes i am~!!.

yesterday, not only i'd manage to purchase a new laptop, as promised by mom,but i also get to buy me, a new handphone.

a new Sony Ericson~!!

huhu.

well. im here now at mel's house. my very 1st tym opened up dis laptop, and he's letting me used the internet connection. kudos to him.

dats y, im so happy!!

.F.A.T.H.E.R.

2008-06-22T01:22:00.000+08:00

Fathers.

Well, he was the person responsible, to make us up, to raise us, provide us shelter, food, and such. Everybody knows that. And some day, I’m going to be one of them. Although, me, ended up marrying? Ha-ha. That would be the day.

What I’m going to write about is MY relation with my father. You see, I had been spending these last few years in a small family, small house. But comfy, that’s for sure. All these while, it’s just us. Me, my 17-years-old brother and my 21-years-old brother and my mom. These, I never cared so much to tell people, but, well, he’s gone, in 2002, almost six years now.

During his life, well, I never even cared about him. Well, I was barely 13 at that time. And, I seriously thought that he would be there, would always be there. But no. he’s gone now. For good. His name was Mohd Hanafiah b. Othman. His hometown was in Perak. That’s why I walways thought that I was lucky. Mom from Kelantan, Dad from Perak, and here I was, in KL. Mix, huh?

My dad, he was a bit quiet. But, strict, whoa! That no one can argue with. He always kept it to himself. Hell, even I, as the child never thought that he had any problem. But he did. We always went off to holiday. To Pangkor, Port Dickson, and such.

What I regretted the most was that he was gone, so sudden. I thought he was going to survive. The day he left us, it was Ramadhan. Almost 8-9 days to ‘Idulfitri. Hell, we did our shopping together, days earlier. Our last shopping. But he was gone, in the blink of an eye. I couldn’t even send him to the hospital. He passed away on the way there. I thought it was going to be nothing. That he would get up, and everything will be okay. But no. Life seriously has taken a whole new path, since.

But, through the years, I had it all sorted out. This taught me, to be way independent. To do it all by yourself. Not to rely on others. Of course, it was so much easier since I had Fikri Ahmad Salleh, Badrul Muzammil, Shariman Akmal. And all my closest friends. So much that, today, I can think about him, and not shed a single tear. Pretty strong-will, huh?

Of course, this doesn’t mean that I’m starting to forget him. No. That’s not it. It’s just, over the years, it was us. I do miss him, badly. And I seriously want him to see how far I’ve achieved. How well I’ve done. And how matured I’ve become. And I want him to be proud for it. I seriously think he would.

And, oh yea~!
A big applause given for Ms Sonora Louise Smart Dodd, a loving daughter from Spokane, as she was the one who honored her father so much that this new day was declared, somewhere back in years ago.

And, just to celebrate this day, here’s some info I digged at the Net. It’s about the tribute to father (duh?!) and how a children should treat them.

* Tribute to Father
Fathers are the biggest source of strength for a child.

* Say Thanks to Dad on Father's Day

* Apologize to Dad on Father's Day

* Celebrate Father's Day with Dad

To relive this moment, I compiled some of the Father’s Day poem, specially dedicated to my Dad, and all those great Dads in the world.

F.A.T.H.E.R.S.

"F" aithful.

"A" lways there.

"T" rustworthy.

"H" onoring.

"E" ver-loving.

"R" ighteous.

"S" upportive.

You Never

You never said I'm leaving

You never said goodbye

You were gone before I knew it,

And only God knew why

A million times I needed you,

A million times I cried

If Love alone could have saved you,

You never would have died

In Life I loved you dearly

In death I love you still

In my heart you hold a place,

That no one could ever fill

It broke my heart to lose you,

But you didn't go alone

For part of me went with you,

The day God took you home.

* this one, for my dearest father*

What Makes a Dad

God took the strength of a mountain,

The majesty of a tree,

The warmth of a summer sun,

The calm of a quiet sea,

The generous soul of nature,

The comforting arm of night,

The wisdom of the ages,

The power of the eagle's flight,

The joy of a morning in spring,

The faith of a mustard seed,

The patience of eternity,

The depth of a family need,

Then God combined these qualities,

When there was nothing more to add,

He knew His masterpiece was complete,

And so, He called it ...

Dad

My Dad and I

My dad and I-we think alike,

He knows just what I mean

Before I even say a word

He reads, well, in between.

My dad and I-we like to fish

Or build a model plane,

Or fix a broken chair or two

Or just a windowpane.

My dad and I-we know the score

Of every single game;

Sometimes he's really busy, too

But he takes me just the same.

My dad and I-we go swimming too,

Each year and sometimes twice.

My dad and I-we do everything;

My dad-he's really nice.
Phyllis C. Michael

A Father Is:

There in every memory

See his love and care

Strength and hands to count on

Freely he does shareProvider, toil so faithfully

To make our dreams come true

Give strong and tender discipline

Though it is hard to do

A Father is God's chosen one

To lead the family

And point it to His will for life

Of love and harmony...

Sue Skeen

Daddy you are the Best

Daddy you are the best,

although you live in the west.

stay the way you are,

while your driving your sports car.

You couldn't be a better dad oh yeah,

don't go driving around mad

I love you for ever 'cause you'r really clever

Even though i puss and shove

I will still show all my love

Olivia Elliott & Simeran Mason

And not forgetting, this song’s goes particularly and exceptionally for those who had gone to meet the Almighty God. We will never say bye~!

THIS IS FOR MY PEOPLE WHO JUST LOST SOMEBODY
YOUR BEST FRIEND, YOUR BABY, YOUR MAN OR YOUR LADY
PUT YOUR HAND WAY UP HI
WE WILL NEVER SAY BYE
MAMAS, DADDYS, SISTERS, BROTHERS, FRIENDS AND COUSINS
THIS IS FOR MY PEOPLE WHO LOST THEIR GRANDMOTHERS
LIFT YOUR HEAD TO THE SKY
CAUSE WE WILL NEVER SAY BYE

AS A CHILD THERE WERE THEM TIMES
I DIDN’T GET IT BUT YOU KEPT ME IN LINE
I DIDN’T KNOW WHY YOU DIDN’T SHOW UP SOMETIMES
ON SUNDAY MORNINGS AND I MISSED YOU
BUT I’M GLAD WE TALKED THROUGH

ALL THEM GROWN FOLK THINGS
SEPARATION BRINGS
YOU NEVER LET ME KNOW IT
YOU NEVER LET IT SHOW
BECAUSE YOU LOVED ME AND OBVIOUSLY
THERE’S SO MUCH MORE LEFT TO SAY
IF YOU WERE WITH ME TODAY FACE TO FACE

NEVER KNEW I COULD HURT LIKE THIS
AND EVERYDAY LIFE ROLLS ON I
WISH I COULD TALK TO YOU FOR A WHILE
MISS YOU BUT I TRY NOT TO CRY
AS TIME GOES BY

AND IT’S TRUE THAT YOU’VE REACHED A BETTER PLACE
STILL I’D GIVE THE WORLD TO SEE YOUR FACE
AND BE RIGHT HERE NEXT TO YOU
BUT IT’S LIKE YOU’RE GONE TOO SOON
NOW THE HARDEST THING TO DO IS SAY BYE BYE

BYE BYE BYE BYE BYE BYE
BYE BYE BYE BYE BYE BYE
BYE BYE BYE BYE BYE BYE
BYE BYE

AND YOU NEVER GOT A CHANCE
TO SEE HOW GOOD I’VE DONE
AND YOU NEVER GOT TO SEE ME
BACK AT NUMBER ONE
I WISH THAT YOU WERE HERE
TO CELEBRATE TOGETHER
I WISH THAT WE COULD SPEND
THE HOLIDAYS TOGETHER

I REMEMBER WHEN YOU USED TO
TUCK ME IN AT NIGHT
WITH THE TEDDY BEAR YOU GAVE ME
THAT I HELD SO TIGHT
I THOUGHT YOU WERE SO STRONG
YOU’D MAKE IT THROUGH WHATEVER
IT’S SO HARD TO ACCEPT THE FACT
YOU’RE GONE FOREVER
I NEVER KNEW I COULD HURT LIKE THIS
AND EVERYDAY LIFE ROLLS ON I
WISH I COULD TALK TO YOU FOR A WHILE
MISS YOU BUT I TRY NOT TO CRY
AS TIME GOES BY…

Abah, I really, REALLY does miss you!!

3.8

2008-06-12T16:28:00.000+08:00

Having spent the last 6 months of my life at the place I dreaded and despised most, well, eventually the result is out~!

My 1st ever result, my 1st ever CGPA and what I’d achieved this last few months. And, frankly, it happened right after I spent the horrible-but-cool-in-a-way weekend, at Seremban. Right after I got back to KL, I just called my ONE of my best friends, fik the Makhayam, and we checked the result together. I was so, excited, curious, afraid… (Whatever feeling, you named it). But it was a relieved, that Fiq was there. For what it’s worth, at least, I still have someone to comfort me.

And I do need comfort -ance, after all. I got 3.8!! well, this thing came off as no surprise, since my friend, has already checked his results, and he got 3.55. and he was like, so confidence that I’d be much better than him. It turn out, yeah, I did! It was so overwhelming.

Fiq and I, we’d made a deal, that he would buying me, at this restaurant that we always hang out together, with our friends. Nothing fancy. Just a simple drink. But we got off really late from the cyber café. And it was already 4.30 in the morning.

So does Monday. I’d achieved what I considered the best result, but, no celebration for me. No nothing. Nada. Poor me. Well, in the night, I went off for a drink, with Sha, and she’s not even my real friends. Tuesday, well, at least Dila’s home. And we dine at the restaurant. Just like old times. With old friends, too. Unfortunately, Fiq doesn’t seem to like the idea of having best-friends-turn-foe in the same table. So, there I was. Caught up in the drama.

I was really looking forward for a present. A new handset. Or a motorcycle. That would be cool. But no. mom thought of buying me laptop. Duh. She already thought about it way before I even sat on the final exam. So as to help me in my work. If only she knew.
Of course, despite all this whining and drama, I still felt blessed. And bersyukur. Since, Allah has given me so much. Place in the University. The motor license. And now. This. Not many people even got the chance. And for that. Alhamdullillah.

.Someone's Someone.

2008-06-12T16:22:00.000+08:00

Outrageous.
Kick in the teeth. Just, amazing.

Well, things people would do to get what they wanted. And of course, I’m no saint. Owh. Cut the crap. I’d spent last weekend, with a perfectly, completely stranger. And the completely stranger family. It all started on Friday. It was the morning. I was whoring around. And suddenly, there’s this person, practically begging me to come to Seremban.

And, what do you know? There I was, on my way to Seremban, by Commuter, which I had not been taken, since I was, say, 10 years old! Well, I do believe that the someone have a good heart, kind, and sincere. I just had to, since I’m already on my way. And it was, I bet, the last train.

Yeah, okay, nice and all, yes. But what I didn’t expected, is that the someone already married. And, I was shocked. Real Shocked. Pure Shocked. Trying to ruin someone’s wedding, that’s not my style. I don’t work that way. I kept thinking about what I said, to this friend of mine, about the exact same thing. How I despise it. And, back then, I’m exactly in his shoes. Gosh~!

So, there I was. Spending a weekend, with a total stranger, and the family. Well, there’s a tiny, good side, out of all this. There’s this two kids, completely adorable. I always love kids. And, sometimes when I was there, it’s the kid that I’m staying for. Well, that, and the fact that the house is rather far from town. So, frankly speaking,
I ‘m stuck.

Then there was that someone’s someone. The person was great, nice, and honestly, the only person who treats me well. So much that, it hurt me to see, how his significant other lying, straight to the person’s face. Well, I do believe that the person already knew that the partner is doping. But I guess, the person wants what best for their marriage. Well, no sir. I’m not going to get myself involved in one matrimony. It was too sacred.

And brace yourself! Someone did admire me. Well, you know how this little festival usually brings people to get to know new people, and eventually end up in love. Well, that’s exactly what had happened. Some girls like me. And asked for my number. Haha. Well, friend’s cool. Although, now that I’ve had that crisis, I strongly believe that I’m not going back to the place. No, Sir!

.Driving a Life.

2008-06-06T09:15:00.000+08:00

I’ve been taking 4 hours of lesson now on my driving class. I was excited! And scared. All over. I guess that would’ve happen to just about everyone who undergo among their first-timers, to drive a car. And God! I’d drive all the way to Pasar Dato’ Keramat. Okey2. It’s nothing to others. But for me, it was huge! And all the times my feet were shaking so badly, I thought it was going to come out off my body. Luckily it didn’t.

At least I got it over with. Well, not really over, n but I was kind of hoping to finish things off, before I go back to UiTM Malacca. And oh yea! That reminds me of the result. Which will come out next Monday. 9th of June. Great. I was hoping, against all hopes, that I will get that 3.5 pointer, and obtain that DL thing. Not for me. For my mom. It was, after all, her hopes to get her son to study at university. And what do ya know, it’s me!

Oh, and that brings to a whole other things. I hate it! I mean, I always thought that I’m only doing this, studying Masscom, so as to satisfy my mom. Truth is, I’m not happy. One of my friend said, “Apsal nak heppy. Ko kat sane nak study. Tak payah happy2”. Was it even true? I mean, in order to excel, one has got to be comfy, and happy. But I’m not. The fact that there’s bunch of people who despise, and backstabbers, that didn’t help, too.

So, I guess I’m stuck in this. For three years. I know. I’m selfish. Keep complaining. While all the times, there were so many others who didn’t even have get the chance to even be in university. But, it’s just… I’d kinda lose all hopes. Seriously. Last year had not been great. And part of it, still rubs off me, I guess. I’d practically wasting my 18. I was really hoping for my life been, u know, fixed. But it’s not. It’s just not.

It was fun, though. I had all this cool friends. Fikri. Shahriman. Dyla. Nazarith (back when she was in). Even Zaty. Hell, I’d even thought us as the cast of Kawan. Silly, huh? And of course, there was Mel. Every step of it. School’s been out since, two years ago. And yet, we still see each other. Our friendship, it’s just amazing. Not to mention, he’s one of the friend that I still stay in touch with.

And for them, and mom, and my family. And, yes. To my beloved father, wherever he is! I know, he would be SO glad that I’m actually doing this. And I know, he would be there to take care of me! Always. Though I can’t see it. So, for all of this, I’m going to stay put. And no one would ever kick me out (unless, I got low marks, of course). I’m going to excel, with not just flying, SOARING, colors. Limelight, here comes Acap!!

Just a bit of lyrics, to get lift up my spirit. Anyway, the song’s great. Although, it’s kind of 3,4 months ago.

Aku sadar bukan mudah

Untuk mengejar mimpi indah

Pernah suatu ketika dulu

Ku punya harapan besar

Kini aku tak pasti

Dapatkan ku miliki

Sudah jauh kita tempuh

Kekalkanlah impian lalu

Mungkin ada hikmat

Yang akan menunggu

Di penghujung jalan

Biar nanti kecewa

Setidak-tidaknya mencuba

Jika halangan menduga perjalanan kita

Janganlah kau putus asa

Karena ku ada di sisi setia menemani

Andai semangatmu gugur

Genggamlah tanganku

Kita hampir ke situ

Adakala ku terasa

Ketabahan tak setegar

Tetapi apakan daya

Berhenti separuh jalan

Percayalah padaku

Aku yakin kita mampu

Biar orang katakan

Rapuhnya harapan

Bukan mereka tentukan lagi

Kau ada aku dan aku punya kamu

Amanlah akhirnya tetap bersama

celebrity, much?

2008-06-04T00:48:00.000+08:00

Highlights of da day…I met Fazura!!

She was cute, and really, I’ve got Mel to thanks. I mean, it was such on short notice. He picked me, we went to KLCC to pick Rio up. And we went whoring around the Pavilion. Not 5 minutes passed and we already come across Aishah Sinclair. THE AISHAH SINCLAIR! Apparently there’s a release of Paris Hilton line of bags. Cant care less about it.

But there it was. Celebrities. We didn’t get the chance to take pix with Aishah though. There’s Raz and Rina from 8tv Quickie. Amber Chia. And whole other celebrities, which, of course, Mel know. As we’re about to leave, well, waddayaknow, Fazura was standing up nad posing for the camera. Its Fazura, or Ezora, owh, waddahell! But, it’s her! Live. I guess, I’m one of the lucky one. And she’s REALLY down to earth, too.

Well, suddenly, Pavvi became the celebrity spots as I noticed Siti Nurdiana and his hubby, Faizal something…not dat she’s really all dat worth it. Oh yea. We saw Zarina Julie Ann. Or maybe that’s her name. She kind of looked at us. But hell, ur not all dat hot.

Next, we were just like whoring around and it was, real simple. I asked Mel to come, he took me to Pavilion and we got to get a shot with Fazura. But of course, what’s a day without drama. Well, there are dramas. Mel and his, well, bulldog. And me with mine. And I only got back around 3o’clock. Walking. Alone. And it was “malam Jumaat” however, its aCap from the block. Had been on the roll since like, forever. Takes a really serious matter to bring me down.

.excitement.

2008-05-25T02:28:00.000+08:00

in about 5 hours, i'll be getting my 1st driving class. i dont even know why am i writing this thing of. but well, i'd be glad to look back and say, "owh, here's me, way before knowing how to drive".

to be frank, i dont even know very much about cars. i even asked my mel, wats a handbrake. go figure.

anyhoo. i hope dat it'll be so much easier than i thought. it'd be busy though. as it'll go straight from tomorrow till thursday. thursday, is khamis, ryte? (owh god! its almost 3, dats y im so fuckin blur, well, im blur in nature, also..)

today, had been great though. family thingy. of course, when i say family, i only mean me and my mom. my younger bro, dat's typical of him. n my older bro, now, i dont need to tell it.

i just fuckin wish dat, after all dat i've done, mom wud realize it. n even rewarded me with sth. a motorcycle wud be nice. but nope. i just have to go to all troble. u'd say dat, no, the "bersamamu" era is way over. kids nowadays always, ALWAYS got wat they wanted.

then there's me. who had, as one of my uitm's colleague once said, been thru a lot. like hell i did. i was forced to walk to school, for 5 years, with dirts and muds. i didnt got any mobile till i was 18, and that was the one that had been stolen, that was. on top of that, i did not even got a chance to say sorry for my father.

not that i want to sound discontented here, but, it seems, my brother got it all. motorcycle. handset, way before i even got mine. yeah2. there are lots of people facing waytoo much trouble than mine. but still...
sometimes, no, make dat most of da times, i wish dat i'd not be here. not even existed. then, all this problems wont come. but then, i couldnt even think my life without KL!! i'd be DEAD!!
well, one's gotta face obstacles in order to gain benefits. or so they said...

.another sad story.

2008-05-23T00:44:00.000+08:00

it had been almost two weeks now since my last paper. of course, i had been in kl a week before dat. well, dis last few weeks since i last wrote, it had been sometink.

1st, i get my heart crushed. more than one occasion, i think. then, there's da license problem. i was suppose to be working ryte now at Isetan Lot 10, but no...mom thouight better n ask me to complete my license. dont get me wrong. i myself wanted to get on with things. but it turn out dat, my 1st class will only begin at 25/05. i might as well work. hrmm. guess dat's my life. never got wat i wanted.

last week had been great, though. ryte after the Sunday paper, for da 1st time, i went to Shahriman's house at Shah Alam. I'll spare da detail. and i spent most of da tyme with, who else, MakHayam. i even agreed to went clubbing, yet again, for the third time, even though my heart kept saying NO.

n i didnt enjoyed it. every bit of it. i guess despite all the stuffs dat i've done, im just not da clubbing type of guy. i stayed at Makhayam's till Sunday. n it was more than enough to drive me nuts.

Monday. we went to watch Narnia. again, another miserable day. then come Tuesday, where i, don't know wat am i doing, went to work at Convention Center. it was TIring!! da money was great, though!!

well, in da next few days, i'll work my butt off to get license. hopefully i'll get it, at least before da new sem kick off.

first~timer

2008-05-05T06:43:00.000+08:00

my first blog.don really know wat to write.well, yesterday was fun. that and the day before.
i come back to KL at 3 something on friDay and Shariman already asked me to keep him company. we went to Fikri's a.k.a MakHayam house. and there, i was having such a great time. i even swim in such a short boxer. haha.go figure~! it was real fun!!

next, come Saturday. the cursed Saturday. so much tinks been happening. all at da same time. fun. drama. enjoy.u name it...

the past was repeating itself. as in, me, SHA, dILa and Shariman were strolling around KLCC. and Pavvy. and Sg Wang. it was just like last year. the moment where i completely did nothinx. gosh. miss dat moment. we went karaoke. n i entered the McD's say-the-crap-in-4-seconds contest, twice. and i got two free BigMac.

rite after i went home, MY BEST BUDDY, mel, pick me up. and it was the first time i met Rio. again, we hang around BB. like, i've been here, in just a couple hours ago!!
of course, i just have to meet Daus, my classmate at UiTm Malacca..
later, we went to Uptown@ Danau Kota.my 2nd time.been longing to go there ever since.bought myself a sweater/cardigan. n then, of course, there was my ONS. back at PLKN. completely ignored me. could this day be more, Confusing and Fucking Complicated??

Unfortunately, it can. Someone who had a crush on me, told me about it. it was late. 2 o'clock. and, to be honest, real honest, i had so many bad memories dat, love doesnt appeal dat much 2 me..

gosh~! life is suckx. u dont get wat u want. n u ended up wif those u hate...the cruelty of life.